How Twerking Saved My Life

I began twerking as a way to come out of my depression. I was sitting on a couch for almost six months straight and felt like someone would after sitting on a couch for that long. My body ached, I was overweight, and I was tired all the time. I was hurting and I needed a fighting chance. I needed inspiration because I was battling constant suicidal thoughts and ideations.

I am bipolar and have borderline personality disorder. Suicidal thoughts can and do haunt me. I don't ever want it to get as bad as it was again, so I need activity and medicine together to help regulate my moods. The problem is, if you're like me, I hate most forms of exercise. This can pose as a real challenge and lead to further depression for me, if not addressed.

I have tried many forms of exercise and yoga was my go-to for many years. I loved it so much, I almost went to school for it just so I could know everything about it. I loved the strength and mindfulness it brought to me. I found out that it was missing something for me when it was too late. I was already in a deep depression, and I was doing everything to come out of it with no success. I was just about to give up on life completely until I heard a song that changed my life forever.

It was a very unexpecting song to change someone's life, let alone someone who was on the verge of committing a final act one cannot come back from. I'll never forget August 7, 2020, when I heard the song WAP for the first time. Megan Thee Stallion and Cardi B tore it up. Later seeing the video, it was how their look incorporated confidence and demanded life their way or the highway. Their twerk prowess was intoxicating to say the least.

Megan The Stallion is my favorite rapper and is such a muse for my very being. I love these female rappers like crazy. If you have ever seen Megan twerk, you're a lucky human being.

I know some of you may be laughing or just plain wondering how WAP could save my life. The answer is it gave me the courage to slowly climb out of my depression. When I watched those women, all I could think of was how empowering they were. They are so brave to get up there and do these moves most people are too afraid to try for fear of embarrassment or whatever their issues may be.

Full disclosure, I am not good at twerking at all. I also have no intention of doing anything professional with twerking. I just love the confidence and life it brings. What I was missing from yoga was just that. Confidence and life. Twerking still provides me with the strength and mindfulness (like being mindful of not blowing out your knees) yoga once did, but it adds the extra spice along with it. Yoga was just a boring routine to me anymore. Don't get me wrong, I love to get my stretch on, but it is no longer my main game when it comes to workouts.

Coming out of my depression, I started off slow with some booty isolations with FoxxyRoxyyy (video at the top). She is the cutest and has the best cues. She got my booty looking good. From there, I watched more of her twerk videos along with other favorite teachers online. Now, I mostly just watch my favorite female rappers’ videos and try to imitate them. I'm no good at it, but I must say I am having damn fun pulling myself out of an exhausting depression.

The best twerk video out there right now is City Girls ft Cardi B Twerk. The woman who ended up winning the challenge at the end of the video was insanely good and deserves to be famous!

Megan Thee Stallion’s Thot Shit is also so very hot to practice. She is a goddess queen at twerking and such an inspiration.

The goal is to be like these women. Even though I know I will never look like these women when I twerk, they have given me the confidence that I need to be me and to continue to want to live. I won’t look like them, but that doesn’t mean I won’t feel like them.

Twerking has helped ground me in finding my inner peace. My mind is no longer racing with suicidal thoughts. It is a workout that will never leave me that down again. I am forever grateful to these women for showing me my worth.