Dishonest, High Conflict, Exhausting Relationships

Narcissists are experts at creating conflict. They thrive on drama; it’s what makes them tick. They absolutely can’t live without it. Narcissists feel alive in the midst of drama; they are fueled by chaos. They’re inconsiderate and self-centered. In the narcissist’s world, it is always all about them.

A narcissist will create conflict and strife between their families, friends, co-workers, no one is immune from their poison. This is the narcissist’s sickness; it is their way of being. Self-absorbed, gossipy, two-faced, drama queens/drama kings, attention whores, and that is on the lighter side of the spectrum. On the heavier side, they are pathological liars, con artists, frauds, scandalous and often violent beings with no conscience.

The narcissist is in it for themselves, at all times, at all costs. They are so diluted by their own false sense of superiority that they cannot seem to see or smell their own bullshit. Likewise, they convince others that the shit they see, and smell isn’t real. No matter what, they never admit to their own crap. But they will not lose an opportunity to point out someone else’s.

When the narcissist is playing the elementary game of deflection and blame-shifting- ‘let’s not talk about me, let’s talk about others’- they won’t stop smearing someone else until the attention is well off of the despicable things they themselves are doing.

Narcs minimize their own wrongdoings, then work the art of distraction and projection. Getting loud, waving their hands around, and mouth running tirelessly to shift the direction of negative speculation onto some other unsuspecting souls, who are most likely not present during the narc’s tirade. Spotlight on the narc; the narc is happy, in an egoic haze of glory, no matter who’s expense.

This is the narc’s go-to weapon. They wear people out. They go in circles. They lie, rant, rave, and rarely listen unless collecting more material to use for their next round of drama. They betray, deceive, blatantly lie, and they see no problem with this. You either join their delusion or you don’t.

There is no honest conversation, nor mature compromise. Either you support their self-delusion and stay stuck in their web of insanity and endless drama. Or you reclaim your own sense, intuition, life and wake up- rinse clean from the brainwashing.

Understand that narcs keep themselves and others distracted from who they are because they are predators and that is what predators do. That is what you are dealing with.

Like vampires, they cannot suck up enough energy in a room. They are insatiable attention whores, with low regard for what is appropriate in various situations.

There is no healthy way to co-exist with a narcissist.

The narc always has to be right, regardless of their merit. They always have to be the center of attention. They have to be seen as the hero or the victim, never the villain, no matter how red-handed. They refuse to see themselves any other way than their grandiose overinflated ego perceives. Therefore, the narcissist has no ability to be honest.

They are not honest friends, family, or society members. They use people for whatever they can squeeze out of them; money, power, labor, favors, even attention or admiration. They attempt to essentially brainwash every single person they meet.

Everything is a game to them.

Nothing is real to the narcissist. They live in a fantasy world where they are the star of their own show. They’re the star, the director, the screenwriter, the casting editor, and they get all the credit. Everyone else around them are merely minions, in the narc’s obscenely fake world.

All cast members are expected to show up in support of the narc- after all, he/she is the star. Should you decide to think for yourself, question or God-forbid take a stand against the narc’s see-through shenanigans, you will likely be met with violence, ostracization, and/or public humiliation. That is just how they operate. Narcs do not respect other people’s lives, opinions, or boundaries.

Even if you’re a relatively good flying monkey, there to serve the narc and fluff his/her ego, they will still turn on you. There is no reciprocation of the respect and loyalty that they demand from others.

Narcs talk the talk but don’t walk the walk. But they don’t need to walk- you do.

Narcissists are quite proud of themselves for things they truly deserve no credit for. Nothing the narc does is selfless. They always have an angle. Their ego is running the show.

It is always about them: everything. Even when it shouldn’t be; someone else’s birthday, baby shower, wedding, etc. Even when they pretend it isn’t- trust me, it is. And a blind man can see it.

Either you are a servant of their ego, or else. That ‘or else’ could mean public humiliation, ostracization, the narc becoming physically violent, or using sneaky gossip. Their intent is to direct other people’s feelings against you. When the narc can no longer control their victim, they try to control the way other people see them.

The narcissist lives in a black and white world of competition, they always have to be on top. The narc’s perceived ‘competition’ is in their head, and it’s them vs. everybody.

The narc has to be the top dog, at all costs, even when no one else was keeping score. They want the most, they want all the praise, and they have a delusional sense of entitlement.

Narcs feel a need to put others down to build themselves up. They use things, anything, against people in an effort to raise themself up. They love to tell half a story, or an outrageous version, infiltrated with their opinions as facts. They work tirelessly to convince others of their bullshit lies, rather than address their own issues so that they can stop creating havoc. But the narcissist has no ability nor desire for self-awareness. Nor any desire for sustained peace.

The narcissist creates quarrels, doubt, hate, and a multitude of negative emotions in any situation they penetrate for too long. Time is of the essence. Get out. Like a prenuptial, take with you what is yours, sever the ties, and be done. Don’t stay in contact with them or anyone close to them. Recollect your peace of mind and salvage the rest of your days.