A Philosophical Approach to Conquering the Fear of Meaninglessness

The possibility that I'm building a life for myself that is meaningless is one of my biggest fears. The dull repetition of days (which seems to be one of life's inherent qualities), haunts me with the idea that a meaningful life is impossible to attain. The idea that life can be devoid of purpose plagues me. From spending many tedious days considering this, I have acquired a deeply embedded fear that my life is useless, meaningless. Days as such take me away from myself, forcing me to look at my life as though I was watching an hourglass, staring as sand tumbles down until my time is out. When I’m breathing my last few breaths someday, watching the last grains of sand fall, I fear I'll look back on monotonous days and despise myself for never turning my life into something meaningful. So, while empty hours drift by, I find myself trapped in a reflection of why I do the things I do. I wonder how I should be living differently to gain more out of my life. I wonder if anyone else feels this way so often. Finally, I wearily wonder if anything is even worth it, and if there is even a point to trying.

Nihilistic questions such as these often reside deep in the mind and remain unspoken, as deeply important and personal considerations for the thinker. I always thought the possibility of finding an answer to the question of whether there is meaning to life is slim to none. Despite this, I found unexpected solutions to my questions within philosophical studies which examined the way that people constantly seek meaning within their lives, but never actually find it. Instead of answering my question of the meaning of living with an answer, thinkers such as Albert Camus dared to challenge whether it even matters.

In philosophy, there is a word to describe the moments in which we feel an unsatisfied hunger for meaning within the world. This is referred to as the “absurd” by philosophers such as Albert Camus and Søren Kierkegaard. The absurd can arise from a sudden feeling of wondering why we’re here, why we’re doing what we’re doing. The absurd, simply put, is moments in time in which humans seek meaning within their lives, but cannot find it.

There are several ways to cope with absurdity. According to Camus, the best way to deal with the absurd is to face it—don't back down from it, or succumb to it. Instead, think about it, accept it, and live life to the fullest while embracing the realization that life is, perhaps, meaningless. This idea lifted the fog from my mind. Camus' writings inspired me to find freedom in the futility of life. Meaninglessness grants us a liberty that wouldn't be found in a life constrained with higher purpose. It allows us to live without concern about whether we are wasting away our time, because ultimately it doesn't matter. Therefore, we are free and encouraged to collect as many experiences as we wish, with the comfort of knowing it's not essential that we live life in terms of quality. We simply need to live more.

The individual who embraces the absurd, by facing it and continuing to live nonetheless, is advantaged in the way that he/she can understand that happiness can still be attained in life. Thinking about the absurd is a unique and important mode of thought that allows us to regard life from a different perspective. Only once we've thought about it and decided to press on anyway, according to Camus, can we can focus on moving forward. Then, we can accept that constant struggle is an inherent characteristic of life. Ultimately, this is the best way to live, because there are an endless number of monotonous, repetitive days to be conquered in life.