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Always Say Gay

An Open Letter to the Queer at Heart

By Ava KarnsPublished 5 months ago 3 min read
Photo by Steve Johnson on Unsplash

When the whole world is connected and you're supposed to be able to be your true and honest self, what do you do when you can't? In 2024 it's no longer taboo to be a member of the LGBT community, laws have passed allowing for same sex marriage, strides are being made for gender affirming care for gender nonconforming youths. So then why are gay suicide and trans murders happening at such an alarming rate across the county?

There's no clear cut solution to solve this issue of systemic and generational culture of anti-LGBT discourse, an issue so apparent that there are even those within the community against being allies to one another. So what do we do when we're fighting against each other, against our own preconceived biases against our own autonomy because of what we were raised to believe about one another.

This is to say, I believe we shouldn't make those outside of the community an other just like we shouldn't be other to them, we should hold open discussion for our LGBT children and teenagers, advocate for proper mental health resources for gay men within an affordable treatment plans, even just something as simple as listening when somebody you know needs it. that said, I admit I haven't always been the most open minded, I was once very full of self hate, and would have likely stayed that way had it not been for the help family and friends, who, despite my undesirable queries knew I could be a better and more positive person.

So if I were to take a moment to think of an ally who never stopped fighting, I would say it's my brother Chris, who I would consider a true gay rights activist, and with this in mind I'd like to tell you a little bit about him.

A very boisterous personality, showy and tempestuous but undeniably positive for the lifetime that's in front of him. It wasn't always easy for him growing up as a ay teenager in the late 90s, and early 00s, much of what we have today as a community was still looked down upon or not available, but from the humble beginnings of his first meeting at a local LGBT support center, he's gone on to work for gay rights and worker's rights on a government level, and continues to advocate for a validation of identify and independence, not just for himself, but for others as well so nobody has to shiver like he used to.

Now, I remember once when he was first beginning to advocate, we had been discussing the issue of Trans Rights, and he wanted my opinion on the Trans experience, and I told him, if memory serves, that it's like being a mannequin out on display with clothes that just don't fit quite right and just want that one pair of jeans that fit just right, and I think, in a manner of saying, that that's how we all feel as the queer and broken hearted, to feel like we can fit and be loved; and Chris has taken such strides to make sure that's a possibility for others.

Yes, it's a comfort to know that despite the issues we had growing up, that he as made such a home for himself and others, that love never left his sight, because something isn't worth having yourself if it's not shared. my brother is the ally I wish everybody could have, and I hope that he knows when the paint is peeling off on waiting rooms walls that I'm proud of him for continuing to fight for me and the rest of us.

If you're gay and struggling know that there is love and support out there for you, and that if it makes you happy, never give up

Photo by Teddy O on Unsplash

CultureIdentityHumanityEmpowermentCommunityAdvocacy

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Ava Karns

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Comments (1)

  • Test5 months ago

    You're doing amazing work

Ava KarnsWritten by Ava Karns

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