The Ink to my Words

To My Ghost,

❀

You used to be the blood

Pumping through my veins like rivers

Now, you are the ruby red substance

Oozing from the jagged wounds on my skin

Hidden beneath charcoal coloured clothing

That disguises my pain

Almost as well as this smile does

❀

You used to run your fingers along my words

(Grooves in paper notebooks)

Now, you are the ink

(Black and blue like bruises)

Once my audience, now my muse

I wonder if you are still watching the stage

(Even from the backrow)

Maybe I should start wearing white

(So you can see the blood from far away)

❀

I cover my cuts and venture past the moat embracing my house

Between sips from my melancholic flavoured milkshake

I see two girls giggling at the window

A blonde and a brunette, smiles covering half their faces

Huddling together as they share secrets and contentment and promises

The waitress walks right through them

More memories materialising as wraiths

More scars reopening on my skin

More bones bending, whispering warnings of breaking

❀

I conceal the shadows beneath my eyes and steady my shaking hands

Between bites of my nostalgia-battered burger

I see two best friends taking refuge in a corner booth

A fireplace and a blanket, each offering the other warmth

There were raindrops in their eyes as they embraced and

I lost my breath as the girl with dark brown hair dissolved into absence

And the blonde one stared after, arms wrapped around herself

As a cold breeze made the tablecloth dance and cooled her food

More confusion serenading as imaginary people

More conflicted thoughts duelling in my head

More heartstrings stretching, screaming threats of snapping

❀

My sky is a starless obsidian and

The last I heard of your weather

It was celestial sapphire skies and golden hour glows

You are climbing to mountaintop views and

I am swimming in soil

Sobbing for air

Suffocating in a coffin-less grave

❀

My skin is cut and bleeding and

Yours is tattooed in new beginnings

We pulled on the lifeline between us

Desperate to gain ground as if it were a game of tug-of-war

When you cut it effortlessly, I ended up on my back in the dirt

Friction burnt hands and a fear of holding on

❀

I weave words into the human-shaped hole you left in my life

When you deemed me not worth the fight

❀

Together, you and I learnt how loneliness could transform into safety

Apart, we watched shelter turn to confinement.

❀

I was a fireplace

You were a blanket

You burnt when you came too close to me and

I suffocated when I kept searching for comfort in your closeness

❀

I'm shivering with numb fingertips and chilled skin

But despite it all, I hope you find warmth on your own

(I hope I do too.)

❀

Sincerely,

The Haunted One.

❀❀❀❀❀

If you enjoyed this please check out more of my poems:

I also have a self published poetry book available to buy in paperback and eBook format here.