The Heartache Chronicles

Forewarning

Grief is unpredictable,

no instance is the same,

sometimes it's a drizzle,

other times, a hurricane,

so whilst I'm sitting quietly,

my only company: my pain,

pull up a chair beside me,

before it starts to rain.

...

The Start of the End

A screen lights up,

glows warmth into

empty eyes,

electric energy

singes finger tips

tapping out replies,

"Where are you?"

I ask, I sigh, I hope,

as your words flood the screen.

that the buzz eliciting butterflies,

will let me fly on their wings,

I miss you.

"Can't make it. Call you later,"

so casually he abandons,

leaves me hanging, left to die

I should be disappointed,

I'm disappointed that I'm not,

he said he'd call,

he said he'd call!

A new thread for me to grasp,

a promise of

his velvet voice

cooing happiness at last.

...

(Not) Coping

Paranoia poison,

I sip upon thy brew,

wilful intoxication,

creating problems new.

Infectious illness spread

your thoughts made of fire,

my innards set ablaze,

destroying all desire.

My words are a weapon,

you've no armour, weak,

why won't you deny?

why won't you speak?

You've been silenced,

by the monster in your home,

abusive accusations,

you're facing them alone.

Sickness in my stomach,

but it's realised too late,

you leave without a word,

a self-fulfilling fate.

Paranoia poison,

you've proved yourself true,

he's never coming back,

and it's all thanks to you.

...

Freedom

My stained fingertips,

drip regret upon the floor,

red wine coloured skin,

breathless lungs sore.

New year's resolution,

resolved on January fifth:

learn how to forget him,

his love was a myth.

...

The New

I sleep with the fan on

in midwinter.

Roaring blades do well

to mask the silence.

Chilled air does well

to caress my skin.

Cold noise is preferable

to the void you gifted.