The Cast on the Cross

Today I was low...

my life is a series of highs and lows...

One day I’m mentally fighting a demon... telling me I’m not good enough and I should use and I’m to tired to exsist

the next I’m a cold Topo Chico with a twist of lime 😏 Going on an adventure To snap some great picture ops

I’ve gotten a little better at pulling myself out of a low...

I’ve gotten no better at calming the high

While on or off pharmaceuticals

But mostly on😞

After I had my son, I decided to try to figure out the best way to deal with my manic depression ... or the still yet to be determined.

I it want more for him...

I want to be the best I can be for him..

and I’m also starting to not only want it for him but myself also!

I need the best me for me

These highs and lows are wearing me weary long before my time

I’m a person who is very spiritual

In many more ways than just a rosary that hangs by my bed...

My grandmothers bible

I love everything about the spirituality of the Native American Indians and tribes their like.

The many runes carved in my home and tattooed on my body... on my side are the horns of Odin and down my spine is a tribute to the goddess Freyja.

Jah gave a plant to the earth that could cure more alignments than most pharmaceuticals.

This is saw to many as an unfit way to worship....

Quite Frankly... I don’t give a fuck

Being comfortable in how you choose to believe is beyond free .. (with me spill being spilled)

I go to the earth to worship my gods and god.

I pray.... I do rituals.... and I feel a deep connection to animals

Yes I believe in many....

I live by the moon

Crystals and Stone abound me and I am in their awe

the ocean in my opinion is a god all to its own self....

in the forest I’m in awe at the beauty and the creations of my gods....

The green of the trees

The smell of the earth...

when rain falls and it feels like it’s washing away all of my previous worries.

When I get a glimpse of nature in the raw...

when my bare feet wander the forest floor

This is when I feel closest to my gods and god.

Today in the middle of the low...a very low low

I saw a cast of hawks sat upon the cross of the church across the street from my home.

In disbelief because truthfully from the distance I couldn’t tell what type of bird they were...

we’re the crows??? I thought to myself two of my faiths combined... beautiful

I grabbed my camera and headed in a path straight to them.

Hawks

As I stare up at them, one acted as if I wasn’t there... and the other stared at me directly.

Every snap you of my camera he just zoned in on me

I was given a sign from Jord and my lord.

To see hawks is said to be a omen or prophecy

Could be good or bad

I was left if a shock like state for a while today after seeing them...

Was it for bad

Was it for good

I searched thru my mind and asked myself what is your intuition telling you...

I pulled many things from this

But in my head has rang from the moment I saw them....

Open your eyes....

oh how many things I could start to tell you this rings true to in my life....

But... what I cannot shake is the sign I was presented with...

to the gods I am thankful... for a sign to their child.

One she so desperately needed at that very moment...

to say the least my eyes are wide.

And so is my spiritually as you see 😊

Frey Ley

This is just a sharing of one of my spiritual moments in one of my manic depressive states....

to anyone how lives with this...

I’m sorry....

and

Push on

Don’t give up on the low day.....

YOU GOT THIS....

and so do I❤️