The Boy Who Played Me and My Best Friend

Let’s go back to my college years, starting somewhere new and seeing new people. A time of youthful hope and innocence, I found myself drawn to a 6 ft 4 boy with light eyes and brunette hair.

His warm smile and natural smile were magnetic. I’ve never been so anxious and giggly around someone, I feel like ever since coming across him, I’ve lost common sense.

In the dining room, I saw a classmate talking to him and I quickly pulled her to the side and told her I really like this boy and for her to introduce me to him.

An hour later I received a Facebook request from him and I left school filled with anxiousness and butterflies. I got home and made my Facebook page neater, and then I accepted his request. This was the start of something magical… as I thought.

After three months of talking, an unexpected twist revealed a painful truth.

On the eve of my 17th birthday, my best friend called me sharing a secret that shattered my world. The boy I caught feelings for, was using me to get closer to this best friend, he had been charming her just like he charmed me.

My birthday should have been a joyful day, but I felt so betrayed.

The pain was profound, a heaviness in my chest made each breath a struggle. I felt foolish for trusting someone who had used my emotions against me.

I struggled with the event for a while thereafter, trying to find significance in the pain. I constructed barriers around my heart to protect myself while the wounds had time to heal.

It became difficult for me to totally trust anyone because I was concerned that nice gestures might conceal ulterior motivations. I’ve come to realize not everyone has the same motives, therefore I have to be careful with my trust.

When I turned 25 years old, the scars were still there, serving as a constant reminder of how vulnerable opening up to others can be. This experience of heartache and redemption serves as a constant reminder to proceed with caution while keeping the door open to the possibility of trust.