humor

Canadian Tuxedo
Introduction The Canadian tuxedo, aka jeans and a denim jacket or shirt, has remained a fashion statement since it was first coined in 1951. After a long day hunting, American singer and actor Bing Crosby checked in at the Vancouver Hotel but was denied entry due to his double denim attire. Crosby’s outfit was perceived as too shabby for such grand surroundings. Luckily the bellhop promptly pointed out that this was no ordinary guest and Crosby was swiftly let in. Levi’s immediately grasped this delicious PR opportunity and created a custom denim tuxedo jacket for Crosby, complete with a red corsage, coupled with their signature 501 jeans. Sewn within the interior of the jacket lay a leather patch that read, ‘Notice to All Hotel Men’, stitching the course of fashion history forever.
By Mike Singleton 💜 Mikeydred 4 months ago in Poets
I Just Want a New Job. Top Story - July 2026.
"We are hiring" posters litter their doors And LinkedIn is drowning in open positions. I send in application after application Tweaking my resume to tailor it For each company. I just want a new job. "Workday is the best hiring website" Said nobody ever. Make a new account for every company you apply for And retype your work experience after already uploading your resume. Autofill scrambles my resume format. This "helpful" technology Hands me double the work. "Thank you for applying, We look forward to contacting you about next steps." I wait. Waiting. Months pass. .... .... Oh, so you didn't want to contact me about next steps? Then, reject me already. I just want a new job. Apply apply, apply. No, I don't need a visa to work here. No, I don't have a disability and will not need accommodations. No, I am not a protected veteran. How many times, And in how many different ways, Can a girl answer the same questions Without ever hearing back? I spent 2 years applying for new jobs, Sending in applications daily And have only had 3 interviews. I just want a new job.
By Annie4 months ago in Poets
Say It
You weave a web of conflict then claim you've been betrayed But I know you're the spider You're the hunter, not the prey You dodge the blame. A coward. No backbone in your spine Always a fucking victim Just whimpering and blind You hide behind sublimimals and fake ass passive text Just dragging out your bullshit I wonder who you'll target next You built a fucking circus then acted so afraid you cried among the ruins of the choices you had made You used your words as weapons then pretended not to know say it with your whole chest or leave the fight alone And if you've got shit to say about me quit acting like a bitch say it with your fucking chest you scared ass little snitch I honestly won't blame you I'd wish I was me too At least I claim the shit I say I'm not a snake, like you
By Sara Wilson4 months ago in Poets
That's Just the Way Things Are
The price of eggs went up again, my paycheck stayed the same. My boss sent out an email saying we're a family and then denied the raises because profits had been strained.
By Megan Janousek4 months ago in Poets
Edge Shelf Incident
Content fell on floor; it might’ve had some lure. It sat on the edge of the shelf, and I was called by the Siren friend. Content fell on floor. I opened the fridge with Herculean force. I stood in the magnet blip as the spaghetti whipped its hair back and forth. Content fell on the floor. I hope you don’t pour rage on top of the cure. But for the love of shelves, don’t balance food on the Lotus edge. Because content fell on floor. I had just lifted weights, but that is not why your system failed. The fridge doesn’t know its strength. When I overhear you asking for the spaghetti trail, I hide behind my door. Content fell on the floor.
By Caitlin Charlton4 months ago in Poets
Quorum of the Damned
The committee convened in the old municipal gym, beneath banners celebrating past triumphs like Successfully Renaming the Recycling Program
By Logan Stanislaw4 months ago in Poets
The Last Applause of the Grave Clown
Beneath a moonless vault of dreadful delight, I penned this account Of a republic of fools who crowned a jester with a crooked crown. The nobles praised his grand display, for he sold them empty triumphs And charged each soul a fee for sorrow, calling misery a gift.
By Tim Carmichael4 months ago in Poets
Vocabulists Agglomerate!
Commencing expounding phenomenal intrepidity. Rodomontade? Confident? Pedantic? Constructive? Regardless, purposely avoiding elementary, commonplace, bromidic simplicity.
By Julie Lacksonen4 months ago in Poets
There's an app for that!
Frustration is mounting. The party is soon. You call on your friend For help around noon. The feast you've prepared Lays waste on the counter.
By Ashley Lima4 months ago in Poets
HOPES SHATTERED
HOPES SHATTERED The itch is incessant ** The sun was just rising as I rose from my bed. “I’ll make my coffee, then grab my camera,” I said.
By Margaret Brennan4 months ago in Poets
Santisima Muerte
Death called September, you've been dragging this out. What keeps you so wrapped up? You're tying knots that will not help you at all.
By Kristen Keenon Fisher4 months ago in Poets
Say It Again
⚜️ ♦️👿😡👿♦️ ⚜️ Are You Listening? I Don't Think You Are Do I Have To Say It Again? ⚜️ ♦️ ⚜️ Listen To Me Follow My Lead Say "It" Again ⚜️ ♦️ ⚜️ It's Only Two Letters And You Use "It" All The Time We All Do It's Not That Difficult Is It? And You Question Me "Say 'It'? Again?" ⚜️ ♦️ ⚜️ Is That So Difficult? Why Do You Question Me? It Will Take You Seconds To Say It Again ⚜️ ♦️ ⚜️ But You Waste Mine And Your Time Just Finding Problems Which Do Not Exist Where There Are Molehills You Make Mountains And The Only Thing I Want Is For You To SAY IT AGAIN!!! ⚜️ ♦️👿😡👿♦️ ⚜️
By Mike Singleton 💜 Mikeydred 4 months ago in Poets