Oh, what a night it was at Soya House!

Oh, what a night it was at Soya House!

Bob's classmates told him it was the best in the country,

Their plant-based burgers, a veggie's dream come true,

But for Bob, it was just another embarrassing night to add to his crew.

The culprit? His stepfather, Drew, who just wouldn't have any,

"I'm not eating no vegan muck," he declared, oh so many,

But wait, Bob reminded him, that burger he had was vegan,

And for dessert, he was eagerly waiting.

Bob's little sister, Tasha, was confused,

"Why are we in a vegan restaurant?" she mused,

Drew replied, "Because you both picked this place,"

And with a gulp, he ordered the pie in a pan, with grace.

Bob just wanted to have a meal out without his family's fuss,

But his mom, May, ate and drank like it was Christmas, oh gosh!

She chatted non-stop, and Bob loved her, but not her cream pies,

Especially when she raised her milkshake like a glass of wine.

But Tasha had a different idea, she thought of bananas,

"Mom, you should add bananas, it won't be gross, duh!" she exclaimed,

"I LOVE BANANAS!" May shouted, with glee,

And Bob prayed with his hands between his lap, "Please, please, please."

Tasha asked Drew, "Do you love cream pies, Daddy?"

Bob corrected her, "Ash is our father, remember, buddy?"

But Tasha shrugged, "We have different dads, don't we?"

And Bob explained, "We have the same one, it's complicated, you'll see."

Tasha then changed the subject, "Look at that man with six burgers, he's put on weight,"

Bob knew the man through many lunchtime detentions, it was their fate,

But May said, "Look at that fat cow over there!" in a sudden change of expression,

Bob whispered, "That guy is one of my teachers," oh, what a confession!

Then the waiter arrived, it was Richard Longlang from Bob's class,

Bob bowed his head, but it was too late, Richard saw him, alas!

"Hello everyone, I've got one spotted dick," Richard said, oh my,

May cried out, "It's your mate Dick Long Lang," Bob wanted to die.

But Richard laughed it off, "Honestly, it's fine,"

And with a chuckle, May said, "With that hair, you do a good job embarrassing yourself all the time."

Bob ate his pudding in silence, with his head down,

He knew the whole school would talk about it on Monday, oh what a clown!

But he thought, maybe he'll visit Soya House again, alone this time,

Or with Tasha, as long as she didn't smear her food on his white top, that would be just fine.