Not How Love Should Be

I won't remember the sweet moment you tried to create

I'll remember you telling me I didn't deserve the gift before

Until I became what you wanted me to be

I'll remember sadness every time I look at it

And the feeling of my throat closing up

I'll remember trying to not cry in front of you

Like every time before

I'll remember crying myself to sleep later that night

Quietly to not wake the person next to me

I'll remember that you left me feeling hollow

During what should have been a happy time

I'll remember because I won't be able to forget

Carrying around this desperately sad ache forever

I'll remember hating myself for thinking things had changed

And for believing I could trust you again

I'll remember that your love is conditional

And that's not how love should be