My 'Friend'

My 'friend' is not always kind,

in fact he's often very unkind.

Spitting words of hate into my mind

as if these thoughts were mine.

*

But they are not,

they couldn't be.

I wouldn't think such things.

*

My 'friend' is considered

a mental disease.

He squats inside

occupies my mind.

*

Everyone tells me

he isn't me,

as if we are separate

entities.

But you see

we are, whether I like it or not

combined to this one body and soul.

Together entwined forever enshrined.

*

Sometimes he makes me want to die

but other times I feel more than alive.

I feel so much happiness I want to burst,

like popping a balloon and all my happiness

will be released into the world.

*

You may not understand,

why I'd choose to defend

my 'friend'.

But he has stuck with me

to the very end.

*

He's been there

when no one else was.

I know he can seem all bad,

but I choose to find the silver linings

hidden within him.

*

He brings me joy,

a mind full of creativity.

A mind that can sit here now

writing this poem.

*

Without him I simply would not be me.

I could focus on everything bad he's caused

to happen in my life, even when he's attempted

to drive me to suicide.

*

But that would be wasting my life

So I choose to find the light,

the good inside of him and,

well, me too if I'm honest.

*

My 'friend' is Bipolar.

He is both

Ying and Yang,

Darkness and light.

So you see without him

my life just wouldn't be right.

- Erin 29th June 2020

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