Mortified!

I found my pink knickers in my neighbor's garden,

And my bra; whoops! I beg your pardon.

I found my used tampon in my drawer,

And my husband's condom in the hall!

Now, I have an itch in my pants,

I swear I have fucking ants;

Fuck! My bathroom door is locked,

Someone's having sex with my Aunt!

Down the stairs I go;

Squeezing the ants back in my pants;

Back up I run, only to hear,

"More, please more!"

I give my crotch a scratch,

The fucking ants in my pants!

My aunt ran out of the bathroom,

And says;

"Yeah, girl! You give it a fucking good groom!"

I am mortified!