I wish to be enthusiastic

my life is filled with sadness

continuation of sleeplessness

I spent days in serious meditation

my head is filled with unstoppable thoughts

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continuation of suffering in my life

I have nowhere to run to, I feel as if I'm being followed

my thoughts are everywhere as I arrange my life

pondering over whatever is happening around me

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my heart is beating faster than usual

as if I had a terrible nightmare

looking at the life I live, tears flow

every day, I pray, yet nothing changes

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people assume I'm okay

not knowing that I have a lot on my mind

I've become my own adversary

I despise myself and the way I live

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I don't even have the energy to face reality

Sometimes I wish I could sleep forever

I wish to be enthusiastic like others

forgetting all my daily problems

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I was born to make things happen

I was born to help myself and others in need 

I was born to make it in life, yet I'm depressed

how do I focus, because I need to step up!