I Need More

still

stuck in the background

quiet. Shhh!

don’t make a sound

alone in the world

no phone calls

text? No

i like my peace

but

I need more

more than this shot to soothe me

More than this blunt

More than these pills

More than a quick ride

these cheap thrills

More than a brisk walk or 30 minute workout

More than the kiss of death to make me forget whatever fight I’m currently fighting.

More than his voice

More than his embrace

I’ll need more than meditation to soothe my soul

Everything bad feels so good

Now I’m racing again

I know you won’t understand

How nothing comforts me

How nothing calms me

Why must everything ruffle me?

Why must everything entice me?

I’ll need more than this shot to soothe me.

More than this blunt, more than these pills.

More than a quick fuck , but that orgasm was much needed.

More than my blood tainted.

More than my face painted.

I’ll need more than some mask to hide what I’m feeling.

More than this cloak.

More than this coat.

My physical being right here before you.

My mental, emotional, psychological being in outer space.

I’ll need more than these drugs to soothe me.

I just need to spread my wings, fly free.

Let me be me.

Untamed, wild, raw, everything they said I wouldn’t be.

Everything they said I couldn’t be.

Everything they said I shouldn’t be.

I need more than these drugs to soothe me.

Because once the high is gone, I need more drugs.

Once the high is gone, I feel more pain.

Once the high is gone, I feel more tears.

My pillows wet while the high disappears in the night leaving me feeling cold and empty.

I need more than these drugs to soothe me.

More than this liquor to warm me.

More than these pills to hold me.

More than this weed to calm me.

I need more than these drugs to soothe me !!!