"Hi, My Name Is..."
"...And I Am An Addict"
I am an addict,
But not in the way you think.
My addiction is touch, physical contact, intimacy.
The rush of dopamine I receive from an accidental brush of a hand is embarrassing.
I am a fiend searching for my next fix in anyone,
Making them my dealer.
I sell pieces of myself in exchange for a few minutes of intimacy,
Real or fake.
My icy fingertips long to feel the burning heat of another’s flesh.
I yearn for the entanglement of limbs, the caressing of noses, the brushing of lips.
My body aches for the security I find in being held.
I crave skin to skin contact like a newborn clinging to a mother’s chest trying to feel safe again.
I’m afraid that no embrace will ever be enough to feed the hunger I possess.
I fear the come down from the high, the loneliness, the self hatred, and withdrawals;
All which occur when I am left alone.
However I am an addict,
But I am in recovery.
I will learn to be content with my own touch and not recoil.
I will learn to love myself enough to embrace myself and receive the same amount of dopamine.
I will caress myself and feel comforted.
I will close my eyes, hold myself, and drift to sleep just as swiftly.
However I am an addict,
And I am craving the touch of another as I write this.
About the Creator
McKenzie Keathley
Just an aspiring writer looking to connect with people through my creativity. 💚
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Comments (18)
Especially at the end of life. https://vocal.media/poets/hospice-b88kgi024n Your poem is beautifully written and touching ;-)
Thank you for expressing a need that I would have trouble putting into words for fear of getting tagged as creepy. A touch is worth 1000 words, a touch from the other side of the bed is worth even more. As we get older the addiction doesn't go away we just accept substitutes, the touch of a nurse or caregiver, a hug from a friend, accidently rubbing elbows with the person in the next seat on a crowded plane. As Jim Morrison once sang, "C'mon touch me babe, can't you see that I am not afraid"
This really hits home for a lot of people. This also one of my new favorite poems I’ve ever read. Keep writing, your literature will touch many…
love this so much. very relatable.
Wow ❤️
Wow, this is good writing and so vulnerable, I loved every sentence ❤
This took a lot of courage. I felt the depth of your addiction in my gut. Good job.
it's beautiful and it's amazing that you had the courage to put this out there for the world.
Definitely felt this. I was just explaining sex and love addiction to my lover. This could definitely be an SLA Recovery ❤️🩹 Manifesto. I like it a lot.
I feel like you've read my diary and I love it.
Very relatable and well written. Great job
well done!
I felt this in my chest. I love it
Very touching read
Love this, very relatable!
Beautifully told. I'm missing someone very much myself. This struck a nerve in a good way. Well done!
who hasn't felt like this,at any point in their life. great writing!
This made me cry. I feel the same. Thank you for a beautiful rendition of my feelings.