Drinking Again/ My Love

Drinking Again—This poem was inspired by my childhood, growing up with an alcoholic mother.

She has been drinking again

Throwing things again

Yelling again

Going in the worst downwards spiral ever

It is sorrowful

Too see her raging

Upset

Half dead

All drunk

The next day she sleeps

With her head in her hands

Crying to herself for yelling

Asking for forgiveness

Which we give

Because she is our mother and it makes us cry when she is sad

Because we will never really understand the power of addiction

She swears to never drink again

We don't believe her

Yet we say okay

The next day there she is with a drink in her hand

She says that she'll only have one

Later that night she's throwing up in the toilet

Crying for me to help her

Running towards her

Helping her up

Play mother for the time being

Seeing her fall asleep in her bed with tissues everywhere

Crying to myself because I shouldn't have to do this

Yet i do

Every day for six years

I wake up in the middle of the night to her yelling for me thinking

She's been drinking again

I am particularly proud of this one because of the truth and love that it holds. The love is there because no matter what my mother does to me, I will always do this for her, lie for her, cry with her, yell for her. The truth of the matter is that I did have to do this, over and over again.

My love—My thoughts beginning this one were revolved around one person. All my feelings needed to come out and this was what did.

My feelings of being in love with you

Are all there

Wanting to be close to you all the time

Heart fluttering at all the right moments

Head spinning at the glimpse of you near

All my thoughts utilized by you

Notions of if you are thinking about me

Excitement running through my veins.

Nervous waves of enthusiasm

Enthusiasm because

I know I love you

Nervous because

I can't seem to say the words

Yet being with you is uncomplicated

Enjoyable

Loving

I’ve been a little envious

I see the way some girls look at you

Like you shouldn’t be with someone like me

Yet you are

Peculiar how that works.

The idea for my future,

Involves only you

My love,

I am scared to death that I am going to lose you.

It is astonishing just how much I feel for you.

-Kialeigh Jason

I love this person I am talking about in this poem with my entire heart and soul. Knowing he is there for me, makes my entire life worthwhile. I thought he deserved to know this too.