Aching Heart

I used to be the Queen of unrequited love. And by that I mean on the receiving end of unrequited love. It was from years of low self-esteem, a warped idea of what love actually is, and the thought that somehow love was supposed to be tied to pain. All of my teenage and early years in my twenties were the same story with different men being played on repeat. And most of the time what it reminds me of looking back now, is how William was so in love with Penny Lane in the movie almost famous while she just treated him like a little brother.

There was a guy who I had the biggest crush on from 6th grade all the way through high school and it was a lot like that. He always had a girlfriend. He was older than I was. He never thought of me in that way and for years my heart ached for him. And those same feelings were familiar in other situations with other men long after I left school. Falling in love with men who I was in the friend zone with. My twenties were a bit of a sad romcom feeling at times. My entire twenties reeked of never ending unrequited love. Kind of like Iris’s love for Jasper in The Holiday.

My teens and twenties felt somewhat like this…. A silent symphony. A journey of unanswered yearning.

In the depths of my soul, the yearning grows

Like a river that endlessly flows

Unrequited love, a relentless fire

Fueling my heart's deepest desire

In the starlit nights, I whisper your name

Hoping the universe will hear my claim

I paint pictures of our love in my dreams

Where reality fades and hope gleams

I write letters that will never be sent

Pouring my heart out, no need to repent

Each word carefully crafted, filled with emotion

A cathartic release, a love in motion

I find solace in the verses I write

In the rhythm and rhyme, my heart takes flight

But the ache remains, a constant companion

A reminder of love's elusive union

I search for signs in every passing glance

Seeking a hint of a reciprocal chance

But you remain oblivious to my affection

Lost in a world of your own reflection

Yet, I hold onto hope, a beacon of light

That someday, our love will take flight

For love knows no boundaries, no time or space

It weaves its own tapestry, at its own pace

So I'll continue to dream and silently yearn

For a love that's reciprocal, a love that will burn

Unrequited love may cause me pain

But I'll endure, for love's gain

For in the depths of my heart, I know it's true

That love has the power to break through

So I'll keep on loving, with all that I am

Hoping one day, you'll reach out your hand.