Turning the Page on Winter

I love Winter, particularly in my home state of Massachusetts. Winter gives us permission to stay home, to hibernate, to read every book on the nightstand, to binge-watch Netflix. I feel stylish because I wear leggings now, not sweatpants. Covid-19 has added its weighty presence to Winter and has had us doubling down on the premise that there is no place like home. We have comforted ourselves with new home-centric hobbies, like learning how to bake sourdough bread (not as easy as you may think) and by banishing canned soup from the pantry. There is therapeutic value to using your wooden spoon to stir the latest batch of butternut squash soup, to feel righteous about the nutritional value and to savor the new skill. There is an abundance of knitting/crochet projects across the country right now; perhaps they will be pulled out again next year and an army of sofa throws will eventually be used while reading the next batch of books and watching next year’s must-watch series. Conceived during the difficulties of Covid-19, we will begin to view these acquired skills and goods as Badges of Honor, representing our survival.

As we see the hopeful signs of vanquishing the enemy named Covid-19, we are also seeing the tease of Spring. Spring is shy in New England, it often has to be coaxed, then retreats, always allowing for the possibility of just a little more Winter. We have hit 60 degrees twice in these days of March winds, and tomorrow’s high will be 30, cloudy and rainy. The rituals of Spring are ageless. They are deeply rooted in most spiritual belief systems. From the Ancient Greeks on through Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Wicca, and Buddhism, there are themes of planning, planting, tending, fertility, celebration of the end of the dark, and moving toward the light. In all of this, Spring Cleaning has become a rite of its own.

It has become well established that cleaning and de-cluttering are healthy for our mental health, as well as the health of our environment. Marie Kondo, author of “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up” has been published in 30 countries. She has sold millions of copies of her books and Netflix has put her on air. Her success, along with an entire industry of organization experts, informs us that we are in fact searching for the “Spark of Joy”.

The Spring of 2020 was my Waterloo. I was in lock-down, in a location I despised (dictated by work), isolated from my family and friends, and heartbroken that my 23-year-old beloved cat had traveled the Rainbow Bridge. I realized that I had not met a carb or a wine that I didn’t like, and there was no Spark of Joy. Not in the gradual appearance of Spring, not in the daily news, not even in the gratitude I felt that I still was able to do my job and pay my bills. I got on the scale one morning in May and weighed in at over 200 pounds. That had never happened before, even when pregnant back in the last Ice Age!

That morning marked the end of my misery and the beginning of my journey to lose weight, to travel to the magical land of Health and Wellness. As Spring surged to Summer, I found myself searching for more; for meaning, for the nourishment that my soul was in need of, for the Spark. As Fall moved to Winter, my commitments deepened and my knowledge broadened. And I lost weight.

What does this have to do with Spring Cleaning, you ask? Everything! And while I have studied, read, and explored many teachers, gurus and soothsayers, one of Marie Kondo’s quotes became a guide that brought together all these paths into one road. "By acknowledging their contribution and letting them go with gratitude, you will be able to truly put the things you own, and your life, in order."

The secret to successfully decluttering is in targeted giving.

I have always gravitated toward creating ritual, rather than just routine. Rituals transcend habits or customs, because they speak to our souls. As the weight started to drop, I started a bag of clothes to give away. This was a habit. A custom. A holdover from my Mother’s admonishment of not letting things go to waste. A remnant of the “starving children” refrain at my childhood dinner table, probably part of the root that took hold in my weight gain. It was mindless, a surface satisfaction of “contributing” to a needy cause. But as the weight loss continued, and Winter brought permission to read, study and ponder, I began to deepen my practice of gratitude. I found myself reviewing times in my life that were not easy. The years that were painful, filled with want and need; the challenges of single parenting, tight budgets, trying to be a Super Mom to my kids and be a Super Woman in my work.

Spring Cleaning 2021 is now an Event, a Production of Consequence, and yes, a Ritual. Decluttering has taken on new meaning as I search for the recipients of these worldly goods that need to circulate out of my closet, my cabinets, my home. I confess: the recipients have never had faces before and this is what I set out to remedy. Here is what I found:

1. Clothing. It was difficult to “dress for success” on a tight budget. All of my clothes that are business casual have gone to an organization that caters to low-income women that are reentering the workforce or transitioning to a new position that requires them to project a professional image. Accessories; handbags, jewelry and scarves can make all the difference in presentation, so I found myself adding to the “no fit” pile. The mission became larger than culling my closet! The particular charity I found also accepts donations of new clothing, cosmetics, hair and skincare products, as well as sleepwear and footwear. The staff is helpful in addressing issues of self-worth and self-esteem and specifically works with women that need encouragement, assistance and a cheerleader. Please, only give in-season clothes, as space is a premium to organizations like this.

2. Household Goods. In the early days of my single parenting, I was fortunate to have the basics, but not the accoutrements that I craved. Candles, art, flower vases, books, lamps, tablecloths, toss pillows, to name a few. In this round of Spring Cleaning, I am touching everything I own, and remembering why I have it. I have a collection of bone china teacups and saucers that were my Mother’s and teapots given to me over the years. While I treasure them, it is time to create a new ritual. Once the public health rules allow, I am having a tea with the young women in my family and their daughters. They will take their teacups and saucers home, and we will continue the tradition until they have them all. Then, they can have me to their house for a proper tea! I have also found an organization that works within the community, helping to turn houses into homes. Sheets, blankets, tablecloths, as well as household accessories, are welcomed and the charity gives (not sells) these items to referred clients from social agencies. Finding this organization has facilitated more decluttering, and more gratitude that I have these things to give. As you go through the process, please don’t donate anything that you wouldn’t give to your best friend! If towels and blankets are more than “gently used”, your local animal shelter will put them to good use!

3. Books! This process has brought me the greatest joy of all. Our local shelter accepts books and we also have a used book store locally that sells books deeply discounted. As I have sorted, I have come across books that provided me insight in my search for Truth. Historical narratives that have transported me to a different time. Thrillers and mysteries that challenged my deductive reasoning and reassured me that unlike in real life, the good guys always surface victoriously. And, of course, the romance novels that offer respite from real life. Biographies that fascinate and explain the why and how of a life well-lived. Some remain in my bookcases; some have now moved to my nightstand for a re-read and the rest have been donated. I had set a goal for the new year that I was going to read 100 books in 2021. I purchased colored, blank business cards and I use a new one as a bookmark for each new book I read. I fill out the name of the book, author, date, and a few adjectives about the book when I have finished it, and the card then gets deposited into a lovely, large vase that I received as a gift. I have entered into my calendar for Thursday, December 30, an evening of review of the vase’s contents and it is an evening I already joyfully anticipate. Before I boxed up the books I am giving away, I took some blank cards, wrote “have a great time reading this book” or “hope this book makes you laugh” or “enjoy” and tucked them into the pages.

Winter opened the opportunity for me to learn more about my community and the services it offers. I purchased bath towels, ponchos, socks, hat and gloves, masks and travel-size personal care products for donation to my local shelter. I am humbled by the work that they do.

Sometimes, the life cycle of something has ended. It can’t be cleaned, repaired or polished anymore, and it is time to let it go. That no longer feels wasteful to me. Now, I am thankful for its past usefulness and take Marie Kondo’s advice, acknowledging its contribution, and let it go with gratitude.

As I move from decluttering to actual cleaning, I am struck with recognition of the past. My apartment building is a renovated mill and the site of the impactful Bread and Roses labor strike of 1912. Labor organized and demanded safer working conditions and better wages. The blood that was shed, the lives lost, is a constant reminder that I have so much to be grateful for. Aesop writes, “Gratitude turns what we have into enough”. In this year of the Pandemic, of scarcity, of fear, of inevitable change, I have more than enough.