The Wild Life

Have you ever sat back in your fancy office chair after a long, stressful day at work and reflected....I am really happy living this life.

I’m talking about the soulful, authentic and genuine feeling of true joy and freedom.

Bliss.

For the majority of the population, the answer is a resounding “NO”, but the justifications associated with lifestyle, kids, bills and other luxuries often serve as the excuses of why they tolerate it.

The reality is that most people simply endure their lives, but are not genuinely and authentically happy with their present. Most people are seeking change in some aspect, albeit career, home, status or vanity.

I use to be one of the majority. As a woman, I had been socially conditioned to seek out a ‘good partner, a good marriage, have children, earn a college degree and pursue a career. This illusion of the perfect life was not only appealing, but it was an unwritten expectation of our social culture. Almost a necessity in order to be accepted as successful.

So many manicured women across the nation, dressed in their pressed expressions of fashion, their salon-styled hair, their new cars boasting of what it means to be a success, all while balancing career and a family.

It was the illusion of being a super hero, the perfectly fit, beautifully presented, professionally painted ideal woman, but like so many young girls and women in the western world, I was sucked into the vortex of success.

I got married, had children, went to college and began hedging my professional career path...you know the one with the 401K plan, medical insurance and flexible spending account to help you budget your medications and copays. I sat in a private office adorned with custom furniture and top-notch technology, answering phone calls, emails, submitting reports and making sure the ‘Ts’ were crossed.

Day in. Day out.

I earned pay raises and awards for being a good, timely and even dedicated employee. I had accrued paid vacation time, sick leave and weekends and holidays off. All I had to do was show up and perform my job duties.

However, I was not genuinely happy with this life. It was draining, both physically and energetically. At day’s end, my soul was exhausted! I found myself collapsing on the couch, with my phone in my hand, eating convenient and processed foods, turning to a glass, or two or three, to help me unwind. It took everything I had just to engage in my successful life!

I found that deep inside of my soul, I longed for simplicity. I wanted to bake from scratch, to grow food in a garden, to make my own soaps, yogurt, cheese and body products. I wanted to live in a cabin in the woods, chopping wood for heat, away from the buildings and cars and power lines. I dreamed a lot of just running away to some remote island, eating coconuts and fish in my thatched hut!

My present life and my dream of the soul were polar opposites. And yet, I continued to sacrifice the real me for the illusion of what everyone else believed I should be doing....the house, the furniture, the car, the social scene, the clothes, fitness and even vanity and fear of age through Botox and other injections. It was all a smokescreen created to keep others happy.

But then life happened as it always does. All things are temporary.....marriages end, children grow up and careers change.

I had to go inside of my own soul and repeat the question: Am I really happy living this life? The answer was a “no”, I am not happy.

No, I’m not happy with this education-fed career choice.

No, I’m not happy with the bill-fed lifestyle.

No, I’m not happy with upkeep on the house, the car and the yard.

No, I’m not happy with the endless stress-filled week and the weekend recovery, which was more like make-up days for getting my personal life in order.

I needed a change or else I was going to fall into the death trap of the medicated and stressed out world! So much anxiety and depression!

The universe often steps up in miraculous ways in order to provide healing and opportunity. And for me, it did.

My toxic and abusive relationship ended, in a situation that almost cost me my life. I got laid off from my job a few months after I had accepted an advanced position to elevate my career to be closer to my home. All but one of my boys had graduated and left the nest to pursue their own dreams.

I was suddenly a single mom living in a small rental house, driving an old paid-off car with a small savings, a small monthly government reimbursement and 6-months to get my life together!

People in my life kept telling me what jobs I ‘should’ take and would often criticize me if I turned down opportunities that seemed perfect! They all had their opinions about insurance and benefits. I realized they were trapped in their own illusion!

Instead of looking for jobs, instead of looking for career opportunities, I began sitting in nature and asking myself questions about MY HAPPINESS.

What brings ME joy?

What do I ENJOY doing?

What feeds MY soul?

I spent some of the money I had saved on books that resonated with soulful healing and I started to read them. I learned to meditate. I learned to be alone. I learned to love myself. I learned to throw away the decades of expectations that were thrown at me from others regarding what I SHOULD DO.

I began to transform and at 40, I began to live my life.

I found great peace in getting away from people and stepping into the wild, hiking remote trails, walking miles along vacant beaches, biking in areas far away from people and climbing hills and mountains where others didn’t seem to want to be. I sat on peaks, edges and crags in solitude. I sat under waterfalls, fully intertwined in the present moment. I shed people who didn’t support me. I shed material possessions that didn’t serve my soul and my happiness, including gifts from moved knees, jewelry, clothing and things I had collected. I threw away trophies and memos of achievements. I tossed old letters, cards and physical items that kept me tied to the past. A place I didn't want to be anymore.

I shed beliefs about who I should be and became who I was meant to be. This was not an overnight process and certainly was not an easy part of my journey, but each day I let go of something holding me to the life of expectations. I was learning to be free.

What did I do for income? I aligned with something that made me happy. I started helping women become better versions of themselves through fitness and emotional support and empowerment. I was a contracted coach for local fitness centers and gyms to augment my income. I even trained individuals out of my own garage!

My life changed dramatically, as I met someone who sought a similar journey in nature. We began operating a small gym from our garage, creating a domain and a following together, and eventually married and set into process our metamorphosis... transitioning into the Wild Life!

The process took us about five years, but we did it. We talked about what we desired and where we wanted to be. We slowly restructured our business and our income earning into something self-sustaining. We began selling off excess furniture, appliances and downsizing our lifestyle. We eventually sold our home for a small

profit and moved into a tiny space we had built in our rental business property.

We saved our cash and focused on our health and wellness instead of tapping into the stressed out energy of the nation. And then the opportunity hit us. It was time to fly.

We sold it ALL. Our businesses that we had developed and grown together. The vast majority of our possessions. We moved to another state to live in a small rock cabin in the middle of a remote forest, taking care of chickens, building structures for sustainability, mending fences and tending to the land.

No insurance. No 401K. No pension.

But what we found was invaluable compared to what we let go of!

Standing in the mirror of the soul, nature often brings out the toxic energies that are trapped within. It shines back to you the negative feelings you have about how others live, behave and act. It also reflects back onto you the insecurities deeply imbedded within your own body and mind that cause you suffering, pain and illness.

The beauty of the forest is overwhelming in both physical aspects and in truth.

The moon is brighter. The sun is warmer. The trees are taller. The silence is louder. The wind is stronger. The air is cleaner. The water colder. The snow is softer. The canvas is much more colorful.

The rich colors change daily, creating a backdrop of unique perspectives and experiences. There are no schedules or timelines. No phone calls dealing with irritated and emotional people. No conflict or stress to create unnecessary irritants.

If you are angry, it is from within your soul and is a marker for your own area needing to heal.

Our lives began to shift dramatically as we began to clear away the clutter of a life full of expectations, stress and illusion. We were sleeping all night and much more active than we had ever been. We were eating from the land and locally available resources instead of from restaurants and boxed foods.

We weren’t worried about how our yard looked or whether or not the neighbor could see our trash, or even what they thought! We didn’t have to deal with people dropping in with their ulterior motives and emotional baggage. We didn’t have to put energy into the ignorance of the world.

When we argued, we would seek respite in the comfort of the trees or under the deep blue sky, who reminded us that no matter the storm, the forest stands and the sky remains. This allowed us to quickly forgive one another and move forward. In fact, it created a space for fewer storms and more nourishing rains that helped us wash away the dust and debris from the conditioning of the old life.

As I sit today, cozy and comfy under the blankets of my warm bed on a brisk summer mountain morning, I listen to the symphony of birds and the sounds of the waterfall just feet away from my home. My new life. I understand I have tasks to complete and projects to begin. However, I am able to sit in nature and reflect deeply upon my surroundings, both without and within. I am able to gather my energy to respond to the day.

I have a choice of what to do and how to do it.

Life in the wild is healing. It heals the soul. It heals the wounds of the past. It heals relationships, both with others and with oneself. It heals the body of imbalances in both physical aspects and emotional attachments. It heals the mind’s toxic stories and creations.

Shifting oneself from what is known as the dream of the planet, where everyone has an ideal of who we should be and how we should act, to the healing and nourishing dream of the self is the portal to a life of authentic happiness...a life of bliss!

Although this shift will be different for everyone, for me as an individual and for us as a couple, the transformation from the daily rat race known as the illusion of success to the peace and solitude of the wild mountains has healed us beyond any medicines or conventional therapy.

Change creates change.

One cannot live a life doing the same things and expect to see different results. Change is not easy. In fact, it is one of greatest reasons people suffer in their lives; the lives they choose to live!

Most people resist change. Some will start down a path of change, only to give up because it was uncomfortable or messy. Of course it is! It’s change!

To desire change is to create change through our own choices. To make changes, big or small, is the truth of transformation.

Change requires shedding the expected outcomes and shifting our mindsets. It requires letting go of belief systems and the way we were raised. It means setting ourselves free from the traditions of family, of friends and of groups.

Change means doing things your way to serve and support your life and your soul.

The jump from the dream of society to the wild was not an overnight process, but for the majority of the population, it was risky and sudden because, for them, it didn’t align with the expectations of what others believe we should be doing. It was rogue! It was impulsive. It was ridiculous. Yet, we had been planning it for years!

But for us, it has healed our mind, our bodies and our souls and it has freed us from the heavy chains of the domesticated planet! We are no longer tethered to emotions and energies associated with others.

It has healed and strengthened our relationship, it has improved our physical bodies and it has created clarity and improved energy flow to our emotional and internal bodies as well.

Nature heals. Nature holds all of the answers to life’s questions...but only if you are ready and willing to listen.