The Art of Forgetting

Writer Chen Jingru, when talking about Zhuangzi, once said:

"To summarize Zhuangzi's philosophy in one word, it would be 'forget.'In the book Zhuangzi, the word 'forget' appears 87 times.In Zhuangzi's view, only by forgetting external matters, life and death, and the self can one reach a state of transcendent freedom."Life in this world is like being entangled in vines, with trivial matters, material desires, and worldly troubles binding us tightly.If you are too attached and keep everything in your heart, big or small, life will only become more burdensome.Understanding how to let go, clearing away unnecessary burdens, will naturally lead to the disappearance of conflicts and worries.You must let go of what should be let go and forget what should be forgotten in order to achieve physical and mental ease, living freely and comfortably.

1. Forgetting External Matters is a Form of Clarity.

In Zhuangzi's "Free and Easy Wandering," it says: "The wren nests in the deep forest but needs only one branch; the mole drinks from the river but takes only what fills its belly."The desire for material things is human nature.But if you are constantly preoccupied with external matters and let your desires exceed limits, you will only end up lost and trapped in suffering.In this life, we actually need very little. Forgetting the temptations of material desires and leading a simple life is the path to spiritual and physical liberation.Zhuangzi lived his entire life with few desires, at one point relying solely on making straw sandals for a living.In fact, with his vast knowledge, acquiring wealth and fame would have been as easy as reaching into a bag.King Wei of Chu once sent envoys with rich gifts to invite him to become the Prime Minister, but he resolutely refused.He preferred living in a thatched hut, wearing patched clothes, rather than being dragged down by worldly desires.Without the shackles of material wealth, he could live freely and transcendently.

As Zhuangzi said: "Let things be what they are, but do not be bound by them."This means that people should control external things rather than being enslaved by them.Peking opera artist Wang Peiyu won numerous awards in her twenties and became the deputy director of the Shanghai Peking Opera Troupe.With fame and fortune came increasing desires.She began buying luxury bags, mansions, and cars, frequenting high-end hotels...To satisfy her growing material needs, she kept taking on commercial performances and attending various events, exhausting herself daily.As a result, despite her material wealth, she felt increasingly burdened inside.Later, her mentor warned her: "Don't sing just for a living; without material desires, one can be truly free."She had a sudden realization and went back to clear out unnecessary possessions.Afterward, she pursued simplicity in her material life, cooking her own meals and buying only affordable clothes.By letting go of her desires, she shifted her focus back to Peking opera and eventually became a renowned artist.The Ming dynasty scholar Huang Zongxi once said, "Less desire makes one feel lighter."Indeed, there are countless things in the world, but excessive pursuit of material wealth and constantly expanding desires will only lead to being lost within them.Human time and energy are limited. The more you value material things, the more barren your inner world becomes.Reducing desires is like adding to your spirit.Learning to forget greed and lower demands makes your life more comfortable and content.

2. Forgetting Worries is a Form of Wisdom.

In Zhuangzi's "Nourishing Life," it records that once, Duke Huan of Qi was riding a carriage to the forest for a hunt.On the way, he suddenly saw something flash before his eyes.He thought he had seen a ghost and became terrified, immediately ordering the carriage to stop and asking his companion, Guan Zhong, "Did you see anything strange?"Guan Zhong shook his head and said, "There's nothing there. I didn't see anything."Hearing this, Duke Huan became even more convinced that he had encountered something supernatural—why else would he see it and others not?Back in the palace, the more he thought about it, the more uneasy he became. He couldn't eat or sleep, and soon fell ill.Zhuangzi said: "External suffering comes from physical punishment; internal suffering comes from inner turmoil."Excessive worry is like adding fuel to the fire of inner conflict, overburdening your mind and bringing you pain.The Qing dynasty novelist Li Ruzhen, in his work Flowers in the Mirror, describes a country called Berleu.The people of Berleu were like the proverbial "man of Qi who worried the sky would fall."They were always anxious that if they fell asleep, they would never wake up again.So, at night, they stayed vigilant, fighting off sleep to avoid "dying in their sleep."

As a result, they never had a good night's rest and lived in constant fear.Due to excessive worry and chronic sleep deprivation, the people of Berleu rarely lived past forty.In reality, many people are like this—constantly imagining the worst and worrying about things that may never happen, only to torment themselves.As the old saying goes: Life is but a journey; why tie yourself in knots?Life is short. If you live in constant worry and hold onto every little thing, it's like putting yourself in chains.Instead of exhausting yourself with endless worries, it's better to relax and take things lightly.As the saying goes: "If no idle matters occupy your mind, every season is a good one."Learn to forget your worries. By not dwelling on or obsessing over things, all your inner turmoil and unease will be healed.

3. Forgetting Gains and Losses is a Form of Attainment.

Zhuangzi tells the story of Sun Shuao, a minister of the state of Chu.During the Spring and Autumn period, Sun Shuao served three terms as Prime Minister, yet he never showed any joy on his face.He was also dismissed three times, yet never showed any resentment.His friend, Jian Wu, couldn't understand this and asked Sun Shuao: "You've been appointed and dismissed three times—do you not care at all?"Sun Shuao smiled and replied:"What is meant to come should not be refused, and what is meant to go cannot be kept. How can one control gains and losses? Why be concerned?"Jian Wu was greatly impressed.Life often doesn't go according to our wishes, and gains and losses are hard to predict.Those who worry about gains and losses will inevitably suffer; those who forget them and do not mind losing will have nothing to disturb their peace.During the reign of Emperor Gaozong of the Tang Dynasty, the Minister of Personnel, Lu Chengqing, was responsible for evaluating officials within and outside the court.At that time, a Transport Officer, while overseeing the transportation of court supplies, lost some grain due to a storm at sea.Lu Chengqing evaluated him as "losing grain during transport, average performance."The officer accepted this calmly and left without complaint.Lu Chengqing was surprised, as the evaluation directly affected his rank and salary.After some thought, he appreciated the man's composure and revised the evaluation to "beyond his control, average performance."But the officer remained as calm as before.Impressed by his poise, Lu Chengqing finally changed his evaluation to "unshaken by fortune or misfortune, excellent performance."Whether in fortune or adversity, the official remained serene, displaying a transcendent state of mind.As the saying goes: What can torment you is nothing but what you care about; what can trouble you is nothing but what you cling to.Life is a journey of constant gain and loss.The more you value something, the heavier it becomes, like adding stones to your backpack until it finally weighs you down.The best attitude toward gains and losses is: "If I gain it, I am fortunate; if I lose it, it is my fate."When you have something, don't get too proud; when you lose it, don't be too downhearted.By forgetting gains and losses, accepting and letting go with equanimity, you will find less entanglement and more freedom in life.

In Zhuangzi's "Nourishing Life," it says:

"Forget the size of your feet, and any shoes will fit. Forget the size of your waist, and any belt will fit. Forget right and wrong, and your mind will be at peace."To live a transparent life, you must learn to forget, to be broad-minded, and to see everything with detachment.Learn to simplify desires, reduce worries, and let go of gains and losses.By seeing external things lightly and letting go of your attachment to profit, forgetting what should be forgotten, you will unburden your mind and live freely.