Resolutions Made After That Year

It's almost become cliché to say that 2020 was a bad year. It was and I'm not denying that, but this year I'm taking some of the life lessons that I learned and turning them into a set of resolutions I hope to take into 2021. We need to be aware that the turning of the clock will not heal a broken world, but hopefully a broken year can make us all into somewhat better people.

LIFE LESSON #1 - People can be incredibly selfish.

While the COVID-19 pandemic brought out the best in some people, it also crushed the eternal optimist in me by demonstrating that many people are inherently selfish. When scientists came forth and said that masks were a good way to slow the spread of the virus, I never dreamed that there would be anti-maskers.

Anti-maskers. People who are against a small inconvenience, one that lowers the rate of spread among their community. How can a small trouble for you trump the needs of your community? Then came the anti-mask and "open up the country" protests. While I fully understand the pain of small business owners and believe the government completely dropped the ball in supporting Americans, that doesn't mean we should open things up and risk the vulnerable. American individuality reached toxic levels this year and I was (and still am) ashamed of these displays.

The Resolution - I will consider the way that my actions affect others. I will put the needs of the community over my own needs.

Life Lesson #2 - Normal isn't always possible.

Like most human beings in 2020, I feel a fight-or-flight response at the phrase "the new normal." No matter who you are, you had to cope with your normal being changed this year. Schools and jobs moved online, retail stores lowered and limited capacities, mask mandates became a thing. Vacations, weddings, graduations... all of them were changed or taken away entirely. You can't lessen the impact of the ground being pulled out from under people's feet.

I learned quickly that normal isn't possible sometimes and striving for some "way it was before" will lead to sadness. I wish that more people had realized that. Your kid can't safely go to school right now, your wedding needs to be postponed. You know what they say about the best laid plans.

The Resolution - I will accept that "normal" changes and shifts over time. I will be adaptable and graceful under pressure.

Life Lesson #3 - Racial justice is more important than ever.

Although I am a knowledgeable person and was aware of racial injustice and police brutality prior to 2020, the year opened my eyes to just how privileged I am. Even as I watched and cried over the deaths of Mike Brown and Tamir Rice years ago, I didn't fully embrace the understanding of what was going on and what continues to go on in America.

The 2020 deaths of George Floyd and Breonna Taylor, as well as the subsequent protests that sprung out across America were eye-opening. The lockdowns and the mass scale of these protests kept well-meaning white people from doing what we do best - putting our heads in the sand.

While we're far away from reaching a moment of true racial justice, the fight will continue and we must all be actively involved.

The Resolution - I will recognize my privilege as an educated white female in America. I will try to help others recognize their privilege and we will make a difference in the world.

Life Lesson #4 - We're all hypocritical.

I'm a hypocrite, you're a hypocrite. We're all hypocrites and we best deal with that now. I've been trying my best to take all COVID protocols seriously. I'm not immune, however, to pandemic fatigue and neither are you. Even early in the pandemic, I was exhausted by the back and forth virtue signaling, the comments on Facebook and Reddit forums about how "I haven't left my house since March," and "shame on those people outside."

While I fully understand and embrace that "covidiots" are out there and there are those who will never take this seriously, I am learning empathy as I have my little slip ups too. I have, since March, done things that were not entirely pure. I have gone on dates during the pandemic, although I did my best to keep my distance. I even had a brief time where I went to the gym in June, but quickly regret it and froze my membership again. We all slip up, including the governor of California who took fire for going to a restaurant in November.

The Resolution - I will empathize with people. While I won't accept outright denial of the truth, I understand that people have their own mental struggles, their own biases and we all slip up. I will treat others with empathy.

Life Lesson #5 - People take for granted what's right there.

This has probably been the most difficult lesson for me in 2020. There were a lot of things I had prior to the year that I took for granted. First of all, my job. I was between full time teaching jobs with the pandemic hit, but substitute teaching was getting me by, then suddenly - no job. I'm a California native, so I spent a lot of my free time at the Disneyland properties in 2019. Losing that fun place, that escape was sudden and surprising. No more impromptu Disney trips with my sister.

No concerts. God, I miss concerts. The gym. Which was so good for me and my mental health.

Come July and August, an odd one of my lost pleasures hit me hard. It was a strange one. I used to escape my airconditioning-less existance by hiding out at the local Jack in the Box, buying a Diet Coke and just relaxing with a book.

Life lesson (and this is the big one) - Don't take even the littlest things in your life for granted. Your friend at work that you love to talk to, that little thing that you do for fun, your hobby, your health - we have so much in the world to take for granted. Naturally, we will at times, but try your best to appreciate what you have. Nothing is guaranteed.

Nothing. Have a happier 2020, my friends.