Pure Confidence

Self-confidence is hugely important. It determines what levels of success you achieve and how much joy you have in your life. It can raise or lower the quality of your treasured relationships. I don’t feel anyone formally verses us in the art of being confident, and while our parents may have encouraged us to believe that we could do something (if we were lucky enough to have that level of support), I don’t feel we grew up realising its significance.

I first became aware of my self-confidence at a young age, probably when I was about 5 or 6 years old. At the same time, I also recognised how this could easily be crushed by another person or a bad experience, and how I had to almost fight to keep hold of my confidence. Obviously it wasn’t as clear-cut as I make it sound here. It was all very confusing to be honest. I am very headstrong and have been since childhood, so perhaps this is what underpins my confidence – my sheer determination to hold onto it.

As I grew up, I became more and more self aware, and increasingly attuned to the behaviour of others. I became more aware of the kind of situations that made me feel confident, the people who boosted my confidence, how to make the most of my confidence, and how to inspire confidence in others.

However, I haven’t always been brimming with confidence. Far from it. I have had many experiences where my confidence has been shattered – to almost nothing. Few things are more detrimental than low levels of self-confidence. At those times when I wasn’t feeling confident in myself, I didn’t take risks, I didn’t enjoy life and I usually ended up stuck in places I didn’t want to be.

However bad things got, I always knew that I needed to build myself back up and reclaim my usual high levels of self-confidence. When you believe in yourself and your abilities, you take smart risks, achieve important goals and develop meaningful relationships with those around you. It’s a much happier place.

There have been ups and downs; I am human after all. But I have reached a point now where I have established a happy medium; my confidence works for me. I recognise that I am a work in progress, and I have to work on my confidence daily, which can mean stepping beyond my comfort zone. As long as I remind myself that it all starts in the mind, I can take those challenging steps or give myself that push I need to overcome what it is holding me back so that I can pursue my dreams.

I still have fears. We all do. But I know that we can beat them and break through that wall of fear and come out on the other side. I have done it many times, and that success is what fuels further success.

Self-confidence is the best outfit, claim it, rock it and – most importantly – own it.

By Amy Elizabeth