Proper Communication Etiquette

Communication can be a challenge. By the way, it's not just to you who're reading this. A lot of us were not brought up in an environment where people could listen to us, where we were heard, or where we had a platform to air our issues and to talk about different things. A lot of people don't know how to communicate, especially from upbringing, and then when you grow up and you have to talk to your boss, you have to talk to your spouse, your roommate. And you find it so challenging to ask for what you want or to communicate your desires because that is an unfamiliar territory to you. In order for all forms of relationships to thrive and be, effective and healthy, we must communicate.

There are things that make communication difficult and things that can challenge communication, and the first one is that we want to control everything, so if you want to communicate something to your boss, your spouse, or someone else, your first thought, what they're going to think about you, what they're going to say, or how they're going to react. Please understand that you have no influence over (what they will say or how they will react). You can strive to please people, but you have no control over what their perception of you will be. That is something you can never control. You only have such control over yourself. So the desire to control everything is the first communication barrier. If you want to be an effective communicator, you can't think like that. You can't try to control the other person on your end because it will never work; you'll only become upset.

Another issue that makes communication difficult is that we don't want to appear like anything we don't want to appear like (I hope you get that). For example, you don't want to go to your boss's office because you appear to be kissing his ass while asking for a pay raise, but you deserve it. You don't want to appear as if you truly need that person, as if they're that essential to you, or as if they're really hurting you. But you have needs and desires. Then, you go out and stress your friends and everyone you know, about what someone did to you, while the person in question is unaware of what they did to you. You don't want to discuss it with him or her. But its affecting you.

I'm going to discuss some methods that can assist you. Things that can help your communication down the line you must remember that you communicate to express your desire and to convey a message; you do not communicate to try to influence the other person's response. You're communicating in order to stand in your truth, say what you need to pass a message, or solve a problem, that's what you communicate for. Now, how does that work?

Another thing is to not be carried away by side issues. For instance, you are in your boss's office asking for a pay raise, and then when you're telling him, I've worked in this company for five years, I have increased the sales, I have done this and this, you're just telling your boss how much you need a raise and how much you deserve a raise, and, yeah he's asking for a reason you came late on Monday. So, instead of getting carried away by the Monday story, you can tell them Oh yes, I came late, but I had an apology or there was a situation that I already communicated about, and then go back to the reason you came to your boss's office. Don't get carried away with distracting issues, always stick to communication.

Another, is to communicate with people the way you want them to communicate to you. Please get your emotions in check. study yourself and know when you are at your best. don't go having conversations when you start crying and screaming and blackmailing people like using manipulation and using tears and then say they did not take you seriously or say they have not responded or whatever. have a mature conversation and respect yourself. If you wanna cry (we cry by the way) go to the toilet and cry there once you're done, walk out go to that office and ask for what you need and what you deserve don't go there with tears and emotions. Because when you start crying it stops becoming about what you're saying it starts becoming about the tears. A good way to solve a problem through communication is to say what you want instead of asking for explanations just tell them I really like it when you call me so once in a while just drop a caller it's actually it's more goal oriented .

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