Losing 100 Pounds

July 6, 2022 was the day. THE day.

I woke up with my usual routine of weighing in, and there it was. 100 pounds lost. I have delayed writing this because I wanted to feel what it’s like for a little while before writing about it. I was speaking in a virtual workshop for my weight loss group last night and a member commented, basically, about how it’s not about numbers and sizes. I pondered that for awhile because I had shared my real numbers while speaking and mentioned how I am looking at clothing I would not have even considered in the past, so I felt like it was directed at me and I wanted to think about it….

Sometimes it IS about the numbers. And that is okay. I took 100lbs of pressure off of my heart, lungs, knees, ankles, back, neck, feet…everything. My blood circulation has improved so much, especially the past few months, it’s quite shocking. Even in hot summer, I would have to bury my feet under several blankets and a heating pad, and it would take 1-2 hours for my feet to feel better. It took up a huge amount of my time and was painful at times. Now my heart can work more efficiently because I have taken so much pressure off of it. 100 lbs of pressure. I have also been told by physiotherapists that our feet and knees take on four pounds of pressure for each pound of weight we carry, and if that holds true pound for pound, I have taken 400 pounds of pressure off of my lower limbs and joints. That is hard to think about! My body has been put through a lot for the past thirty years and I am working toward thanking it by being as healthy as I can be in my remaining years.

I am not focused on an end number because I truly have no idea what an ultimate goal weight will be. I will know when I get there, but yes the numbers ARE important. They do not speak to my character or my personality, but the numbers directly affect my life and how I live it. That is a fact, but it has almost become taboo to talk about it. It is a cold hard fact that carrying 281 lbs on my 5’5 frame was absolutely unhealthy for every single part of my body! It doesn’t matter if I dressed to the nines and projected confidence and zest for life during all of those years, because all of the confidence in the world could not save my internal organs and my joints from suffering. It’s just a fact. Wearing fabulous clothes, wearing a swimsuit at the beach, having the self esteem to appear in photos without hiding, celebrating my body no matter the size- none of that changed the fact that my whole body was unhealthy and suffering. It is something that I had to come to realize in order to start this journey and,most importantly, stay on it. The number on the scale IS important. I was 281 pounds and now I am 176 pounds.

My next step is figuring out where I want to be. I still have a lot of lower tummy fat that I know is unhealthy, along with excess skin and some fat on my I thighs and arms. This still adds friction, pressure, and strain. It is not all about how it looks. I know that I still have a lot of changes that I want to make. I want to be fitter and be able to jog longer than a minute. I want to be that 50+year old jogging down the road that might even inspire others to get out and do the same. I want to have a lot more upper body strength and maybe try a rock climbing wall here and there. All of that means increasing my activity amounts and types, so I am working on adding in more of that now. It’s a mental struggle because I think my brain is stuck in 1980s aerobics class era haha - thinking I need to jump around like crazy until I am sweating buckets, and the prospect of that does not thrill me at all 😁. But in reality it is small changes like doing 5-10 mins of Yoga stretches per day, adding in 5-10 mins of Tai Chi movements each week, starting beginner Arms programs (10mins tops), etc. That’s what I am working on right now, building those habits slowly but surely. That should also assist in weight loss, as I sit about 21 lbs from my program goal. I set it at the top end of the dreaded BMI range because that seemed the most sensible thing to do, but I continually remind myself about how I thought it would be next to impossible to reach 180lbs…. And here I am below that already! So, I know I can do it. I am so excited about this, I can’t really put it into words! I am sure it’s been more than 25 years since I have been this weight. Surreal.

There I go talking about numbers again. But this is my reality and those are my numbers. I had a heart attack two years ago, a 46 year old female! I think you can see why it’s so important to me. Don’t wait for something bad to happen, like I did. Start making healthier changes in your life right now. One step at a time, and give yourself the chance to be steady before taking the next step. Swap out a food (like my life-altering 0% Greek yogurt instead of mayo and sour cream swap), go to bed a bit earlier tonight, drink a glass of water when you wake up, try a free five minute stretching video online, anything. Pick one thing you can work on right now and do that. It all adds up over time. I stretch out my legs and back when I am making supper…I am just standing there anyway, so why not hold the counter and slowly stretch out trouble zones? It all helps!

Losing 100 pounds has helped me drop yet another blood pressure medication and I’m making an appointment to reduce another because my BP has been so low. My size Large work shirt is getting baggy and too long (I was a size 2-3X before). I can get up off the floor pretty darn fast compared to how I had to get up in the past. I can run for short bursts, but I mean RUN! A full-tilt, all-out, burst-into-sudden-speed run (which I turned out to need to be able to do at my new job). I climbed hills on our mountain camping trip last month without even thinking about it. Without running out of breath and feeling like I was holding others back (or blocking their way!). I took big high steps without my knee exploding. I got into a hammock and didn’t have to worry about the weight restriction for it. All sorts of things like that have been happening and it is BECAUSE of my decision to lower the number on the scale. And the way to do that was to make myself a priority and make more and more healthier choices as I went along. I am determined to hold onto everything I am feeling right now and remember it, to help me stay on this journey.

I was worth giving myself more time. I AM worth that. And so are you ❣️