Happy in Doses

I think a lot of success circles around the happiness of a person and what they've got. It is often perceived that a successful person isn't happy and a happy person can't be successful and while that can be the case, it depends on the person and their perception of what happiness means to them. A lot of pressure and expectation lies too heavily in seeking a fulfilling life with another human being; this deprives the heart and mind the capacity to differentiate between the two. Is it really possible to meet a maximum potential of what dreams stain in the brain with another human? Yes, the answer is yes but it can leave an empty space. Though, that is the power of how someone perceives something to be. You can have it all but it takes a lot of understanding, commitment, and determination. I can go on and on about it as there is no right and wrong as I've said in the first part of this series but again, just trying to reach out with my own thoughts and experiences.

There's parts of me that stick to the stigma of a perfect life consisting of finding someone and getting married and starting a family but there are also other major parts of me that feel empowered with keeping my ambitions on track for the things I want to accomplish in life. However, being able to find a way to have both of those things are quite possible. To me, success is measured by a steady dosage of being in a happy state; this ranges from having bills paid, taking care of myself(mentally and physically and sticking with it), bettering myself to not have to live paycheck to paycheck, saving money and having a cushion to fall on in case of emergency, working toward a writing career, inspiring everyone around me and anyone I can across the world, building a stable life for my new family and offering an open space for anyone who feels less than they deserve. It's a long list and who doesn't have some of those things to worry about but I've always wanted more than just working to get by and survive. To me, survival doesn't mean that you're living but that you're alive because you're still fighting even after a battle has been won. Some days will feel impossible and some moments will feel like they'll never pass but when you look at happiness as something to have rather than to be, it opens your mind up to infinite combinations that you've locked up inside yourself.

To me, how I perceive happy is having the ability to have balance with the things you want to accomplish in life. It is something to work towards as a level to complete and not necessarily chase after to be because if you're always wanting to accomplish something you won't always get to that state of mind but you can be happy with the work that you do while getting there. It goes along with having a main goal in mind and then having smaller goals in the mean time. There is nothing wrong with being satisfied but there is something negative about always needing to be satisfied. I've always been someone that's wanted more out of life rather than the mundane and that may sound snobby to most but there is nothing wrong with that. A healthy state of mind creates the belief that these many little steps will lead to a final resting place, a happy place.

A lot can change when you open yourself up to the power of perception; your feelings can be influenced less by others' actions and words, your responses can be met with intention and understanding of the situation, and your resilience can become your armor against anything that may make you uncomfortable. Knowing these things isn't always promised an expected outcome but it can help maneuver your way through life and your ultimate goal. I've considered myself as a complex individual with all varieties of this notion and as I believe in perception, I still can fall into the trap of what life offers. You just react, you just feel, and you just feel broken down. Sometimes it is more than you can handle but it is a fleeting moment-- even when that moment stays for a while. Our expectations and understanding get in the way when we're met with a complication of another that can't quite connect and meet those barriers. Not all people can pull from deep within themselves and conduct themselves in a way to look at things from outside themselves. It is an ever-changing and evolving experience and it takes non-stop improvement to achieve.

You have to understand that being who you are is not going to work for others all the time because they can only see you as far as they've seen themselves. It is hard work looking into what makes you who you are, it takes discipline in reasoning with why you are the way you are and why you act the way you act, and self-realization can be scary. It is a whole lot easier to bury it down and just find people who match them. These are things I've come to realize about myself and it may not work for anyone who reads this but I think this is how we get more meaning out of life and our experiences. Rather than saying, "everybody sucks," what if it is you? What if how you treat people sucks? What if how you talk to people sucks? What if how you judge people sucks? What if how you think of yourself sucks? It will always bounce off of you and reflect onto whoever you're looking at. Perception will teach you that after you cycle through all of that, it very well can be them and that is when you can release yourself from their damage.

The good news is that there's a dosage for that. There's work to be had in every moment that you carry out. If you want better experiences and better connections with people, you have to start with yourself and your goals of how to get there. If you're feeling down, look around and figure out what is going on, how you got there, why you're still there, and if something were different what would it be that could change the way you feel. Nobody should have the power to change the way you perceive yourself so that is the first step. I'm not some robot with a view, I have my times of self-loathing and crippling anxiety of the outside coming down on me but I fight to get out of that state of mind and find myself bouncing back to the things I believe in. To believing in the ME of me. There's no greater love of your life than yourself and you have to treat that with the respect and courtesy of your own being. So, the next time you're feeling backed into a corner, try to find a way through the maze of conflict and carry out with the solution to what's making you step backwards in the first place. It is all deeply rooted in the way you see things, a happy dose of perception if you will.