Cylestea's Tips for Enlightenment: L.O.V.E. Yourself First

Do you love yourself? How do you show it? There are things we do that really aren't conducive to loving ourselves, and I think it's time we start talking about them.

First, as I spent an evening lost in insomnia, I started thinking about what I've done wrong in the past when it comes to loving myself. And this acronym came to me:

Loving

Oneself

Vibes

Energetically

Meaning, if you love yourself, authentically and unconditionally, you will vibe higher. Your vibrations will shoot out into the world and people will be inspired by your confidence.

So, what are the things we're doing that aren't allowing us to love ourselves authentically?

Letting toxic people in your life

Friends, family, classmates, co-workers -- there are all sorts of people we come into contact with on a daily basis and it's pretty likely some of them are toxic. Yes, we all have some sort of toxic traits, but I am talking about the people who are continually toxic -- those who talk about people behind their backs, always leap over the boundaries you set with them, start fights for the sake of starting fights, always think of themselves first in all situations -- you get what I'm saying.

I do want to say that you SHOULD be thinking of yourself first because without taking care of YOU first, you can't take care of the other people in your life. However, those who get stuck on themselves, those are the toxic ones. They make everything about them and your issues don't matter.

So, now that we have that straight -- ditch those people. If you've asked them not to gossip, and they continue to -- ditch them. If you set boundaries and they ignore them -- ditch them. Allowing these energy-sucking folks into your life takes away from your ability to love yourself because they're absorbing all your caring and loving energy and turning into into questions -- am I good enough? Am I the bad person? Do I set too many boundaries? No. No, you are fine -- and you deserve people who pick you up, not those who pull you down.

Not striving to reach your dreams

Another disservice you're doing to yourself is not following your dreams. You're never too old to chase your dreams. You're never too old to learn something new. You're only too old when you're dead.

Your dreams are valid -- even if they seem miles away. Even if you never reach them, there is still some satisfaction in chasing after them. When you love yourself, you strive to bring more joy into your life.

Letting your imposter syndrome control you

I'm guilty of this anti-self-love thought process. Sometimes it's other people's voices popping into my head saying I'll never accomplish anything, and sometimes it's my own voice.

I think that everyone experiences imposter syndrome at some point in their life, whether it's related to work, hobbies, or even your relationships. The key to not letting it have control is to acknowledge the feeling, pinpoint where it comes from, turn it around to the positive side of things, and then let it go. Once you let it go, you can get on with being your badass self!

Another way to combat imposter syndrome is to just keep learning. Keep studying the things you're interested in, keep gaining more knowledge, and keep getting your hands dirty. The more confident you are in your skills, the less you'll hear those nasty little voices trying to bring you down.

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All three of these things can help you build your confidence, and being confident is a great way to express your self-love outwardly to the rest of the world!