Combatting Creative Enemies

I held onto so many beliefs about myself as a creative, for too many years, that blocked me from reaching my true writing potential. I've had the same (well, not exact same at this point -- it has evolved) novel idea for 14 years. FOURTEEN YEARS ... that is more than half my life now! Why this long? Perfectionism. I have always believed in the idea (or at least, the general topic), but wasn't confident enough in myself as a writer to be the one to tell the story, and then as I got older I gained more confidence but there were also pieces still missing and it wasn't all QUITE right yet ...

It's been a journey.

We are all born creative. This means the creative blocks we have as adults (or even as children) were put there artificially -- society has blocked us from living the creative life we were meant to live.

"Whatever creative path we embark upon, big or small, we're bound to encounter enemies from within and without."

I love that Felicia Day refers to these blocks as "enemies" -- something more seemingly tangible, something we can combat against. She has so many amazing tips and techniques for fighting back against a fair few of these enemies! In fact, I suggest you pick up Embrace Your Weird for all the incredible exercises Felicia has provided (especially for combatting your creative enemies). But first, let me share some snippets of Felicia's wisdom with you.

(Note: This is not an exhaustive list, and Felicia addresses that, but in my personal opinion, I think she did a great job at nailing down the major players!)

Powerlessness

"If we can't get a six-pack overnight, why would we be able to get a deep-seated sense of emotional power quickly? Duh! This is a PROCESS!"

First, we must show ourselves we have agency of our lives in small ways, in all areas of life -- finances, career, relationships ... if you're feeling powerless in certain areas of your life, start there. THEN you can begin to work on gaining your creative power.

Anxiety

"Our anxiety is redeemable, I promise. Because IT THINKS IT IS BEING HELPFUL."

I have been struggling with anxiety for a year now ... okay, my whole life, but MOSTLY this past year. I'm not a counselor, and I haven't finished my Anxiety Management Diploma yet (at the time of writing this). Felicia isn't a counselor either, but she has received quite a few techniques over the years from mental health professionals, and has done countless research on the topic of anxiety ... so I'm not going to say much here, except please please PLEASE read Embrace Your Weird for the super great anxiety section!

Procrastination

"It's helpful to understand that procrastination is not laziness or shiftlessness. It's often a result of feeling overwhelmed and not knowing where to start."

Taking a big dream, like writing a novel, can be daunting. Break it up into smaller tasks, and start with what feels right to start with -- it could be chapter 1, OR it could be that really cool fight scene in the middle between the protagonist and antagonist that you've just been so excited to put on paper.

Perfectionism

"Perfectionism teaches us the lie that there is only one 'right' solution."

Felicia recommends writing a paragraph of a novel ten different ways (if you get stuck), and then continue on writing. I like this! Now, of course, adapt this to your own creative outlet ... if you're into baking, try decorating 10 cupcakes using different piping tips or different coloured icing. The point is, explore play, have fun.

Fear of Failure

"We're afraid of failure, but each of us has a unique way that it's activated around creativity."

This was an a-ha moment for me, because Felicia continues on to say her fear of failure is "I am afraid that I will not be loved if I mess up" ... YES! You may have a different reason why you fear failure, but mine is so similar; I feared disappointing my family if I pursued a creative career -- during the career, and after if I ended up not making it as a writer -- and basically worried that I couldn't reach out for help if I flopped. In order to tackle this fear, start with figuring out the root of it: What is YOUR unique fear of failure reason?

Shame

"Yes, making mistakes is the worst. Especially if they are avoidable. But COPING with mistakes is a skill we have to practice in order to create. We need to learn from them, offer forgiveness to ourselves, and move on."

My favourite quote is "Dream as though you've never failed" -- learn from your failures/mistakes, but don't stop dreaming because of them.

Regret

"Yes, our lives would have been different if we had made different choices. Different is not better. It's just different."

When I was 22, I didn't apply to film school even though I really wanted to ... because as much as I wanted to go, I never truly believed I could make it as a screenwriter. 27-year-old Kaitlyn has all this confidence now and wonders what life would've been like if I HAD applied. But I know I wouldn't have met the love of my life, because I most likely wouldn't have moved to my current town. So yes, I've wondered, but I don't regret it -- I CAN'T regret it, for that reason alone.

Jealousy

"The fact is: we can only succeed in OUR world, not someone else's. The RIGHT success for us comes when we are most planted in our own unique weirdness."

The other piece from Felicia that I like is that we don't actually envy other people; we envy the reward other people received for their efforts. We can't REALLY be jealous of someone else's blood, sweat, and tears now, can we? It's not great to have an attitude of "I could've written a better book than this" when you didn't actually put in the effort to WRITE the book and continue to not write, but simply moan and groan and woe-is-me instead.

Real-Life Foes: Stereotypes, Criticism, and Human Enemies

"The word 'criticism' is, by definition 'the analysis and judgment of the MERITS and FAULTS of a literary or artistic work'."

I lumped all the real-life foes together, but obviously this wisdom is for criticism specifically. We often think of criticism as only negative, and we get hung up on that ... but it's really positive AND negative judgment. When we put our work out into the world, sharing our gifts, we are asking for both kinds of judgment ... and we cannot control if it'll be positive or negative. All we can do is lovingly accept it all, consider the feedback genuinely, and graciously thank the person for taking the time to share their thoughts with us.

Conclusion

I don't recommend every single book I've ever read, and I try to recommend books based on other people's tastes. This one, however, I will share over and over and over again until I am blue in the face, because it is truly brilliant. Embrace Your Weird is the reason I am a Life & CREATIVITY Coach, and it is the reason I got back on track with my writing and am steps closer to publishing my own novel. The best part about this book is that it has SO MANY exercises -- not just for combatting enemies, but throughout all of the chapters. I cannot stress enough how life-changing this book has been for me. It is FULL of beautiful wisdom.

(Note: This is my second article relating to EMBRACE YOUR WEIRD; if you enjoyed this one, and would like to read the first, click here.)