Cheers to 22'

Cheers to 22’

Wow. So here I am with a glass and a bottle of red wine to my left. On my right, is my phone, “Architectural Digest” with Ellen Pompeo on the cover in front of her beach house in Malibu. There are also some coloring pencils, ready to create a vision, and mood board.

I just want to sit here and reflect on the year.

I’ve been off for a week, during the holidays and it's starting to draw to a close, in a few more days, I’ll be back at work.

Why now? Well for one, I’m alone with my thoughts and physically, alone. My partner has decided to pick up more shifts at a job where he gave his notice, basically two months ago, and quit last week. But I’ll get into that later, or never depending on how this goes.

I am allowing myself to write freely.

So 2022.

As I scroll through my phone photos, I start to notice a lot of moments embracing my apartment which I share with my partner, since the fall of 2021. There are plenty of pictures of nature and us together, and especially on his phone too, maybe more of those.

At the start of the year, well we were settling in, I think navigating. Word of the year Navigating.

The whole year really has been about navigating and figuring out, through trials and errors and more trials and more errors. I think more errors than trials.

At the end of March, I also started working at a job that involved dance, literally. It's a well-known dance franchise and I worked as a receptionist there for the past few months full-time, with teaching in between, and now I am asking if I can become an instructor full-time. At that moment, they can offer me part-time, and I took it. I’m not sure when that’s going to in affect. I’m a little anxious if I am being honest. My other option, very strong lean toward is working at a weed dispensary down the road from my apartment building. It is literally 10 minute walk and a 3-minute drive. What the fuck? Why not, right?

I’ve wanted to work there since I moved here, but I didn’t have my cannabis certification. I remember dropping off my resume several times after I received my certification, but by then I had already received a dance job. But two jobs doesn’t sound bad. I dance and I sell weed, what else could I ask for?

Before I started the new job in March, my partner and I visited Toronto around my birthday. It was so lit. Except everywhere we tried to sit down and eat, we needed a reservation, and also I had my period. So for most of the day, we chilled in the hotel room and ate pizza while it was rainy and windy outside. We were in Toronto, favourite city, and I was loving it.

Shortly after I started my new job, it was so chill at first and gradually started to get more hectic with more responsibilities, especially planning huge events in the year. Those rose my anxiety levels high, to the point where I would break down crying when my boyfriend would call me and ask how I’m doing, and I would say, "I want to quit I don’t wanna work…I want to pursue art full time" but I would suck it up and show up to work anyways. I got stronger and stronger and developed a thick skin towards my Russian bosses. They are actually nice people and hardworking, that’s all I will say.

From Springtime all through summer and into fall, that’s all we did worked and worked. Enjoyed lots of moments in nature, water, and trees. I ended up traveling 'freely' for a work trip to the states, and it was so lit.

However, our money habits were ebbing and flowing. Credit card debt. Gross. We were working good fucking hours and making good money (as I'm reflecting on it now) but we made a lot of money mistakes, that got us to where we are right now asking 5 different people for money to help cover rent for the last month of the year. Yep, that's the hard and cold, but also not permenant reality. We had to learn somehow.

This brings me to 2023.

I have a few areas and goals in my life that I would love to work towards and get better at:

1. Finances.

My goal for this year is to somehow land a job, a creative job/job that I would enjoy, with good hours, close to home (or work from home), that pays $3000 a month. For some people, it may not be a lot, but for me, it is enough. I don't know what this job looks like yet, but I know it's on its way soon. I do share my finances with my partner, and he's en route toward starting a new job that pays way better than a kitchen supervisor at a restaurant. But together, we will set the world on fire. I desire to pay my bills with ease, save money, and invest...but really just be better at managing money.

2. Creative Practices.

I am very passionate about dance, so my goal is to work towards becoming a master at dance - open to all styles. I want to be able to choreograph well and teach well, to the point where I am asked to work with famous people. that's how big my dreams are.

My other creative practice is art. I've loved it since I was a child. This year, I would love to create more art pieces and post my process on my insta as well as start selling them, on the side. I started doing it during the midst of the pandemic, but I didn't make it a consistent practice, so I stopped. This year it's happening.

And then last but not least, writing. Becoming the best writer, I can be. Writing articles daily or frequently & publishing, to point of writing a book and publishing that. What I can't say verbally, I say in my writing.

Through all of this somehow, it would be great to make $3000 a month. That’s what I desire. A creative job, not sure what it looks like yet, but I know it feels chill and less demanding less anxiety.

Our monies will be good. Bills will be paid with ease, we will make more than we need and we are able to save and go on vacation, and start saving for a house or a condo.

So cheers to 2022. Thank you for what you've put me through and allowed me to experience and grow.

May 2023 be filled with more abundance and success and stillness....and joy...for everyone.