Being Alone in a Crowded world

Everywhere we go, today is separated in silence. Covered in sheets of fear, the act of being social becomes a withering fight for survival. The world that’s filled with knowledge and visual stimuli, we can get overwhelmed & burnt out faster than most. Adjusting to new measures of living we try to make the social scene known but yet barriers barricade us an we all end up alone (together) in this crowded world.

Without forces & direction the mind wonders to find a sense of belonging. It’s safe to say that family & friends are available (sometimes not) but without self presence you tend to fall into the void of your subconsciousness.

Lost and out of place, your hobbies becomes chores as you emerge into stagnation. With social activities cut off, opportunities for exploration & a sense of social belonging flutter into the flames. Your escape quickly becomes your normal.

Alone with your thoughts can either be great company or a tug at melancholy. Surrounded by a wave of silence blowing through the busy air, you become blurred out to new faces & your existence gets transported into a different plane of reality. Mentally stagnated, you become a slave to your thoughts and slowly descend into your subconscious where your sanity and morality are tested. You are then exposed to many versions of yourself & then confronted by fear. The fear of self.

The Fear of Self is easy to explain but difficult to interpret. Being afraid of yourself & what you’re capable of does come up for some people from time to time. Being aware of your abilities in the scope of what you can do helps to practice self control & resilience. Those with so much potential can fear success & instead of pursing endeavors can lead to the Mario effect. The Mario effect is referenced to the Mario character in Super Smash bros. Mario is described as someone who knows a little bit of everything. The best round about stats in terms of balance. The Mario effect combined with the fear of self can hold us back to our potential & with this crowded world so limited we adapt to find answers.

The fear of self stems from your past when your achievements in your younger years wasn’t acknowledged positively. Having a constant negative reaction towards success as a child contributes to not achieving that level of success but reaching just close to the top. Most people are afraid to fail & sometimes that can motivate them to aim for success. Is this the same with the fear of success? In some ways it does. Actions would take place in order to assure they will not succeed but those actions tend to have an opposite outcome.

As we get older, we see the world in a different scope & pick up skills to adapt for survival. Daily practices like self motivation & routines to get the body moving is a great start. In the battle with self we tend to focus on our failures & mistakes rather than our ability to keep moving forward. When put into a corner we fight & adapt for a better future & when alone in a crowded world we take the time to regroup, learn a few things & come out stronger than ever.

Alone in silence. Betrothed to your thoughts, we contemplate on the doorway to escape. Aiming for a way out we are not just exposed to our darkness but the light as well. Often times we forget all the achievements & victories that come with our growth. It’s the positives that helps us connect more valiantly with others. Including ourselves we forget to realize that self help & care is training our psyche to fight the good fight. To break away from the chains that bind us. Use our past as a conduit to propel towards the future.

Fear of success mostly is caused from past trauma according to psychologists. Other triggers could be internalized experiences that stem from getting your hopes up just to be turned down or connections of negative reinforcement resulting from potential victories. In retrospect, trying to focus on memories where you gained success when you was & younger & success when it’s more recent helps to separate those current fears. Focusing on the positive emotions connected to those memories of success give an anchor to how it feels to be in that state.

Like meditation, fear of self prevents us from blooming into the peacock that we are. When we’re alone, it’s the best opportunity to tap into our thoughts & connect with the you that’s the best version of you. The harder it takes the better you will be in the end. It will get easier & you will make strides that gives you the ability of flight. Translate fear into learning. By practicing this method fear doesn’t become something that holds you back but allows you the ability to learn from what comes your way rather than run away from it. Embrace your strengths & capitalize on your benefits to help you conquer your fear & change them to hope. The hope to learn & continue on the pursuit of self