2024

I believe in the power of New Year’s resolutions. Over the years I’ve manifested material objects I’ve desired, lost the unwanted pounds I promised myself I would shed, completed degrees no one thought possible, and traveled to my dream destinations. I'm a very powerful witch with years of accomplishing superficial goals, but always too shy to identify what it is I truly want to achieve. All my life I’ve wanted to write beyond the pages of my diary and hidden Word docs and never once have I made it a resolution.

Twelve years a nurse (and counting) made me feel like that was all I had to contribute to the world. I believed that my earthly duty was to serve those in need, silently healing other’s loved ones as I faded into obscurity. I’d be nobody but a ghost dedicating her life to warding off death. Though I locked myself away in a pigeonhole I created, I never stopped writing. I flooded the pages of my diaries with my grief and my joys. I wrote elaborate love letters to my friends and the occasional lover. My coworkers often compliment my notes, always detailed, always painting the scene in an otherwise dry read. “The patient then became visibly frustrated, throwing up their hands and loudly sighing when explained that the hospital, unfortunately, does not assist with rent payments, but will happily provide prescribed medications free of charge upon discharge. The patient was dissatisfied with this answer and demanded this case manager exit the room immediately. ICM (inpatient case manager) will continue to follow and assist with discharge planning.”

But for 2024, I have dared to make resolutions unlike those I have made in the past. This is the year I resolve to chase my true desires. I want to come forth from the shadows and share my writing in a greater way beyond the pages of my diary. Vocal offers a space for me to share my silly creations, to find my voice, and to connect with others like me, drawn to write. I’m resolving to find myself and allowing Vocal to be that tool and that support.

My goal this year with Vocal is to use it to replace my mindless scrolling, and instead read the works of others in hopes of inspiring me. I hope to find my voice through Vocal, to play with different genres and styles through each writing contest. I want to emerge from the shadows, no longer a ghost pouring her soul into her diary, but as a woman who dared to share herself through prose or to create a world from the fabric of her imagination. I resolve to use Vocal as my tool and partner to achieve my goals this year.

Specifically, I resolve to submit to one challenge per month for practice and to play with different writing techniques. I resolve to read at least one piece of work per day and make sure to comment my support as well. Though invisible and anonymous, I see this community as my peers and I want to see us all succeed.

It scares me to think of what I may achieve if I apply myself if I dare to pursue a dream that has no guarantee and no way to measure my success. This is the year I use the tools that I have found to work towards my intentions. This is the year I write, this is the year I share. This is my year.