Yoga To Fill the Single Mom’s Cup

I love being a mom. I love yoga. I couldn't imagine not being a mom. Or a yogini. These two wonders found me, challenged me, and made me better. My heart is eternally grateful.

I am a single mom. Things have certainly not been easy. The struggle is real. I’ve been playing the juggling game for almost ten years- trying to work, take classes, find childcare, clean the house, cook the meals, help with homework, spend quality time with my kiddo, make playdates, take kiddo to gymnastics and band practice- you get it. It’s a lot to carry. And as single moms, we carry it by ourselves. We are always on. We have to be. We have to make this thing called life work.

I’m not gonna lie; I definitely felt like I was going to lose my shit a few times and collapse under the pressure of worldly worries.

And then…Yoga.

Yoga has saved me from crumbling into the abyss of despair. Yoga has been my one-stop-shop, holy grail, life medicine. Yoga has truly been like a miracle; it has seriously helped everything. And it can help you too.

Me time

First off, single moms need refuge!!! We can’t be slaves to our lives all the time. We need an hour. One hour to seek refuge in the clean, quiet, welcoming mystique of the local yoga studio.

We need to get on the little island of our yoga mat and be free; for one hour!

Seriously, it is like a vacation.

Community

The best people come to yoga! Seriously. Other adults, seeking refuge from their worldly worries, come to yoga to fill their cups! As a single mom, I don’t get to spend much time with friends anymore. I really enjoy the chance to share in a bit of small talk with other adults!

Breathe

Yoga will teach you how to breathe. I’ve heard a lot of mamas say that they don’t have time to catch their breath. This quite literally happens. When we’re busy, trying to check all the boxes on the to-do list, or when we’re under stress, we likely aren’t breathing in a deep and healthy way. The body breathes on its own anyway, you might be thinking, who has time for that?! It only takes a moment of awareness to breathe consciously; just a moment to notice that breathing has become shallow and high in the chest. When we’re breathing short shallow breaths, we are perpetuating the stress cycle in the body.

Have you ever been trying to calm someone down and said to them, 'take a deep breath'? That’s because it works! Deep diaphragmatic breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system, slows the heart rate, lowers blood pressure, and promotes relaxation.

Center

Yoga brings the body and mind back to center, in the present moment. Yoga tames the monkey mind of wandering thoughts, distractions, judgments, and mental chatter. Yoga gives us tools to reel our mind back to center, to the present moment, where it works best for us. We spend so much time in our heads and most of the time we don’t even realize it!

Through breathwork and mindfulness techniques, we keep guiding the mind back to observing the flow of breath- deep, slow, complete, rhythmic breathing. This practice is important, as the mind is a powerful tool when it is focused. But when we have a head full of thoughts, we can become exhausted and weighed down. If we ride every thought train, we become distracted and irritable, and we miss out on being witness to the present moment where life is happening.

Move

The physical practice of yoga is movement medicine! Moving through yoga poses, while breathing deeply and completely, with a focused present mind, is absolutely medicinal. The body holds stress, in the form of tension and tightness. It needs to move in a mindful, intentional way in order to flush out excess stress hormones and relieve aching muscles and joints.

The poses themselves are very empowering!

Standing up tall, grounding your feet into the mat, in Mountain pose, gives one not just physical, but mental strength and stability, to stand up against anything. Raising your arms up over your head and lifting your sternum toward the sky is joyful! Practicing the Warrior poses builds confidence and breeds calm strength.

The way you physically hold yourself and the way you move your body impacts the psyche, and vice versa. We can literally move our way into or out of a mood! Moving in powerful ways creates a feeling of empowerment. Moving in a joyful way creates a sense of joy. The brain actually creates endorphins upon moving the body through the asanas.

It’s really quite a fascinating system of interconnectivity.

Rest

After this hour-long practice of deep full breathing, centering the mind, and moving stress from the body, we can assimilate the practice by resting in stillness.

When’s the last time you got to do that?! Just resting, awake, not thinking, not doing, just being.

This is the final portion of the practice, called savasana. The teacher might read a poem or offer a short, guided meditation. You simply rest, release all efforts, and melt. It is decadent!

Revive

When the teacher rings the Tibetan bell to conclude class, I feel like a new woman! Having reconnected with my true nature, I feel deeply rejuvenated. My entire being feels light and refreshed. I am calm yet energized. Tension has dissolved. Aches have eased. Mind is relaxed yet focused. I feel peaceful, patient, and grounded. Calm and confident.

And I get to take all these good feelings home with me!

I honestly feel like a better version of myself. Not just a better mom, but a better ME; the whole me.

Yoga fills my cup so that it can flow over into the rest of my life. It shapes me to be the best version of who I am. It allows me to show up in my life, with a cup full of love, energy, and renewed strength, so that I can give more fully to the people and things that I care about.