Simple Methods to Creating New Friendships

If you want to make some new friends, here are some easy tips to make it happen.

Simple Methods to Creating New Friendships

Studies have shown that being social and having friends is good for your over-all well being. Making friends isn't always easy, especially when most of your days are spent at work and you have little time for anything else. When the quality of your time becomes more important than the quantity of your time, it is important to have some sure fire ways of getting people to like you and then, subsequently, forging friendships. Unfortunately, some people simply do not like people. And they don't care if people don't like them. They are arrogant, braggadocious, and just plain not nice. Whatever their issues may be, those folks are on one end of the spectrum. Weeding out those people can be quick and easy.

On the other end of the spectrum, you have the people who must always be with a friend, at least one. They are always on the phone, texting someone, calling someone. Being alone is not an option. Ever. They are people pleasers and are constantly trying to enlarge their social circle. You might want to weed those folks out as well. And then there are the regular people.

Regular people like being friendly and they also like being alone. A happy medium. They like when people like them and are slightly bothered when people don't-but it doesn't become pathological. You want to find friends like that.

If you are looking to make some new friends, or any friends at all, here are a bevy of ways to get people to like you. Once you get them to like you, it is up to you to get them to continue to like you. Good luck with that..

Smile

If you have a smile on your face, people will think that you are approachable. There is a fine line between a smile, which is good, and a smirk, which can tend to be off-putting, so please learn the difference. Practice smiling in the mirror so you know which face works best. A smile puts people at ease and makes them feel that you want to engage in conversation. Always make sure to check your teeth after eating because that piece of spinach between your teeth can prove to be awkward in commencing a friendship with someone.

Good Mood

Being in a good mood is contagious. When you are meeting people for the first time, you want to give the best impression possible and if you are cheerful and upbeat, that can put others in a good mood as well. Studies have shown that hanging around individuals that have a positive attitude can impact your mental health for the better. No one wants to be around negativity, there is enough of that in this world. When you come off as being all "glass half full," more people will want to go get a drink with you.

Sense of Humor

People like to laugh. People like people who make them laugh. But please make sure you are really funny and not trying to hard because that could backfire in a big way. Just be your funny self and hope that it is good enough to make people like you. Knock knock jokes are probably not eh best approach, but have no fear, once you have cemented the friendship, you will have shared jokes and you won't have to try as hard.

Mirroring

The term "mirroring" means what it sounds like. You actually mirror or mimic the person with whom you are interacting. By attempting to copy the person's body language and their gestures, you make them feel that they are spending time with, well, themselves, and that puts them at ease. New York University did a research project in 1999 which proved that "mimicry facilitates liking." 78 men and women participated in a study where they were being mirrored by the person they were "working" with. At the end of the project, most reported really liking the person they were working with. This was known as the "chameleon effect."

Tell Them a Secret

The trick to getting people to like you, is making them think that you trust them. One way to do this is to tell them a secret. The problem is, you don't want the secret to be too personal, like you are having an affair. You want it to be personal enough that they feel you are opening up to them, but not a secret that will scare them off. You want them to feel that you value their opinion on whatever tidbit of information you are sharing with them.

However, you must remember, that if you are telling a secret to someone, it can also be misconstrued as you not being able to keep a secret-very fine line. Tread carefully.

Let People Talk About Themselves

Most folks like to hear the sound of their own voice. When attempting to get people to like you, let them think that you like the sound of their voice as well. Make eye contact and let them speak. And speak. In an attempt to gain maximum likability, you want to do the minimum amount of talking; Let it be all about them. There is a chance that you will enjoy what you hear and then you can choose to propel the friendship forward. If you are bored out of your mind, or horrified, you can just let them think that you like them and move on.

Spend Lot of Time With Them

Way back in the 1950s, researchers at MIT had an epiphany that college students who lived near each other were more likely to become friends than students who lived further away. This is referred to as the mere-exposure effect and it seems fairly obvious. When you live in the same dorm, you have more in common and you are more likely to hang out. They seem to be lacking one obvious component-the students need to like each other. If you like the person you are trying to trick into liking you, by all means, spend as much time with them as possible. You will both learn soon enough if the friendship was meant to stick or not.

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Banji Ganchrow

Self-proclaimed writer, masters in social work. Has driven 3 sons to 22 baseball stadiums. Hopes, because of this, they will never put her in a nursing home.

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