Positive Psychology

To begin my reflection, I’d like to do a quick summary of key features that I will refer to throughout my reactions. She divides the hows of happiness into ten main ‘to do’s’. She first provides evidence that you can in fact become happier. Second she has the reader reflect on their person level of happiness, third she gives an array of happiness activities and emphasizes the importance of finding one that matches your personal interests, values and needs. Forth, after introducing happiness activities she begins a categorization of those activities, starting with gratitude and positive thinking. Fifth, and the next set of activities is investing in social interactions, sixth managing stress, hardship and trauma, seventh living in the present, eighth committing to your goals, ninth taking care of your body and soul, and finally she describes ways of sustaining your happiness. She even adds a final chapter specific to those suffering from depression and anxiety. My main reaction to this book is very positive. She has successfully compiled numerous happiness activities and positive ways of sustaining and achieving them. I have read a lot of books pertaining to pulling oneself out of depression, PTSD, anxiety, etc. but this is the first scholarly yet personable book on achieving more than ones baseline.

I really enjoyed her approach in writing this book. She was able to state clearly the numerous misconceptions about happiness. Not just by stating them but by explaining why they are myths and why they do not apply to the reader. She debunks most of the reasons why a person might feel ‘well what’s the point’ which is essential in motivating people. Rather than beginning with categories, she introduces the reader to different activities and explains how they can be implemented. The book continues this by explicitly saying that not all of these activities will work for you, and prepares the reader in order to keep them from being discouraged if this happens by offers suggestions for altering the activity for you specifically. There is even an assessment to try and identify the most implementable of the activities depending on your initial motivation. This is a wonderful tool because it would be very easy to give up if you tried a couple and none of them worked, you might think it was a bunch of hogwash, or that there’s something wrong with you. She prepares the reader for these things and provides ways to avoid this.

Personally, I love the gratitude and positive thinking activities. For the most part, I already implement them but this book gives me an additional way of preparing myself for life in general as well as giving advice to someone who seems to be feeling bogged down by life. I really benefited from the section on over thinking. Regardless of how positive I try to be, I have a huge tendency to over think things. Though this is a good problem solving tool it is also useless and stressful at times, especially when it keeps me up until 5am. She was able to give good advice about this and now when I start to over thing about things I stop myself and either think about all the things and people I’m grateful for, or I send a simple text to someone, thanking them for something they did or for simply being who they are. I also practiced gratitude while I was in Cleveland visiting friends. Though I had thanked my friend I don’t think she knew just how much her kindness and just who she was impacted and helped me. So I made a point to tell her just how wonderful of a person she is and how much love she spreads to the world around her and how that love changed a lot of things in my life. I get chocked up just thinking about it and instead of hinting at those things, I embrace the elevation I get when I think about people who are like her and savor the feeling of gratitude I have for her and other wonderful people in my life.

I also really enjoyed reading her chapter on practicing kindness. I work at a hospital so there are always instances where my kindness greatly impacts someone’s day. I don’t love walking miles a day, I don’t love being around messy bodily fluids, I don’t like serving food, but I love how much better I can make their day by being kind. Even when they are rude, I know it’s because they are going through a lot right now, being in the hospital, so I make a point to be extra kind to those people because they need it more. I stay and help them eat, open things, heat a blanket up for them or just listen to them complain about everything. I listen wholly and agree with them and show my full attention and empathy and apologize profusely if needed, regardless of the actual cause. I can literally see the difference in their demeanor after doing those things. They are so grateful and I always make sure they know if they need anything at all that we are all here for them, even if it just means hugging them or telling them they are loved and cared about after hearing devastating news. Kindness is what impassions me and I love how well she was able to show its importance and impact on the receivers’ and the providers’ lives.

My final reaction is about her section on meditation/mindfulness activity. I also plan on writing about this for my fourth reaction paper so I will keep it short. Sometimes silence is the cure. Not in your surroundings but in your mind. Like I said, I over think and this activity has had a huge impact on my life. I have always liked yoga and meditation but it’s too structured and difficult to do when I really need it. The mindfulness component in meditation is a new concept to me and it has helped me a lot! Now instead of staying up for hours thinking, finally giving up, getting up and making a list, I now have a solution. When my mind won’t stop while I’m lying in bed, I practice this. I focus intently on how every piece of my body feels. I start at my toes and work my way up to my head, although, I’ve never made it that far. Whenever the stress, or any thought tries to creep its way in, I simply say okay I hear you then go back to my toes, etc. Within ten minutes I’m asleep. I’ve tried a lot of things in my life to fix this issue but wow this was amazing. My breathing slows my heart rate calms and I can dismiss the stress filled and usually pointless hypothetical thoughts.

This was a very good book to read and I will and have already recommended it to some friends and have given out advice pertaining to the subjects/ activities listed within this book. I especially love the appendix because it shows other activities that may work depending on one’s already discovered favorites.