It's Okay to Be Sober

I don't drink, and that's something a lot of people have opinions about. Any lifestyle choice that you make is personal, but a lot of the time you'll find yourself constantly defending your decision. From my experience, many of the people who challenge you do it because they envy you. If I had a pound for every person who told me "I wish I was as strong as you" or "I wish I could do that" when I told them I don't drink, it could have paid my rent (and I live in London).

Through my nine years of being of age (legal drinking age is 18 in Norway) and being socially expected to drink, I've faced a lot of different reactions to my abstinence. Most of which, and maybe this comes as a surprise to many, have been good. When I made the decision not to drink, I was surrounded by great friends who never pressured me to do it. This has continued in most of the places I've moved, including the party-heavy Orlando, Florida. It wasn't until I moved to the UK that I faced some straight-up criticism for not drinking. I know stereotypically Britons are considered people who love to drink and go to pubs, and for most people I've met, I'm one of the first non-drinkers they've ever encountered. Me not having alcohol has definitely been met with a lot of criticism in this country, and every time I find myself in a drinking situation with people who don't know me very well, they ramp up the peer pressure and heavily express their disbelief in my quality of life. Unfortunately, not drinking alcohol is not really socially accepted here.

I'm comfortable with the stand I've taken, and I'm not gonna give in to people trying to get me to drink. I think it's also easier for me than for a lot of people, as it's easier to stay away from something I've never tried. This also means I have no idea how I would react to alcohol or how my intoxicated self behaves, and I wouldn't want to find out in the company of strangers. But I hope this negativity doesn't scare anyone else away from making the decision to quit drinking. I'm by no means against alcohol or think it shouldn't exist, it's simply just not for me. So this is aimed at people who don't enjoy drinking, but feel the peer-pressure is too much to stop doing it. Not drinking doesn't make you lame or boring, and it doesn't mean you can't still attend or enjoy a party. I remember when I was younger, after a whole night of partying I went to get in my car to drive home. Someone at the party confronted me and said I shouldn't drink and drive. They hadn't even noticed that I was sober. Being sober doesn't make you boring.

Making a decision that differs from what society expects from you and from what people consider "normal", is going to raise questions. Unfortunately, this is something you'll just have to be ready for. There are countless reasons why people choose not to drink. Why it's the right decision for you is a personal matter, and you don't need to share it with others. People will ask regardless, as they are desperate to find out what made you make this in their eyes, crazy decision. Common assumptions I get are that I grew up in a strict family, I'm very religious, or that I had a really bad experience with alcohol. Neither of these are true, but that actually makes people more curious. There not being an obvious reason to refrain from drinking baffles them, and they find it hard to accept.

Some people also consider it rude that you won't take part in the drinking, and I've even been asked "So are you not gonna drink at my wedding, then?". Sometimes you need to remind people what's important, and in this case I think my presence at their wedding matters more, regardless if the drink I'm toasting with contains alcohol or not. I've also been asked if I'm not gonna drink in my own wedding, and I honestly don't understand why that matters at all. Getting married won't be about getting drunk, it'll be about... yeah, getting married.

Let me throw in a few perks of not drinking alcohol, to shed some light on he good parts.

1. You save a lot of money. In my late teens I was always the only one in the friend group who had money, as everyone spent all they had on alcohol.
2. No hangovers. I don't know what it feels like to be hungover, and I know I'm not missing out on anything.
3. You'll remember everything from a night out. Some of the most fun memories I have are from parties, which the other people involved don't remember.
4. Not drinking is definitely healthier for you. Alcohol is literally poison, and your body won't miss it.
5. You're in control. Not allowing something to cloud my judgement and change my attitude gives me a feeling of safety, as I'm always aware what I'm doing.

The point is, if you don't want to drink alcohol, you are absolutely right to make the choice not to. Don't let anyone make you feel bad about your choice. You don't have to drink if you don't want to.

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