I Am That I Am-Now What?

This is something that I've thought about often (but especially recently as more of this idea unfolds) but never put the thoughts down on paper, in order to better understand the concept and the action behind it. So I'm going to play the tape through as it were, right here.

For centuries philosophers and monks have been contemplating their navels only to find that humanity has moved further and further away from Nature and further away from its instinctual/animal, intuitive/spirit self and higher self. I don't think that's the intended path but it is still one of a thousand variables..

Collectively, there is no unity. It's even worse on the individual level-we haven't even made friends with our own selves. You may have heard the expression "We have met the enemy and it is us." It seems as though we have been pitted not only against each other but pitted against ourselves as well.

That's how we are conditioned in western society anyway. And western thinking is so bass ackwards but if you are privy to the plan that became the corporation of united states of america, you'll easily see why we are conditioned like this. It's not right by any standard but there it is! But that's a history lesson that will never be taught in school nor even as a cornball lesson on an after school special, however it is for another time-like extracurricular.

This age of "future shock" and with ever diminishing resources we as a society, Western society are already on the verge of collapse as our insides, anything and everything as a function of an internal life is denied, suppressed or labeled any of the plethora of psychiatric diagnosis' available, one or another of them in popular "trends" at any given time takes precedence in how we conduct our lives externally. But it effects us in our internal life too and many times is the cause of cognitive dissonance that is readily seen and for right or wrong judged by others in our external life.

On top of that, humankind has conveniently completely skipped over what should have been or should be "the chemical age" as we are in the haze of it presently. Again, a topic for another late night rumination.

So, many people are brought up in Western society to value the wrong things-certain not to value or even acknowledge any kind of internal life, separate from our external life, though enmeshed in it. That we can validate anything purely on an internal function or conscious decision made only within ourselves, without any kind of external validation doesn't happen often.

And people are increasingly afraid to be by themselves, which is different than being alone and different than being lonely. I mean, a lot of folks cannot reconcile by themselves alone as their only company because that would eventually lead to self-discovery as an individual.

The codependent need for the approval of others usually wins out over a true deep dig into self--whys and wherefores of what you do, to really suss out your own motivations.

Existing to just know that you are or that I AM isn't an end-all.

I think Chris Corner of IAM{X} was on to something when he chose that name, according to wikipedia Corner is quoted: "The name 'I am X' refers to Becoming X, the title of the Sneaker Pimps' debut album. Corner explained that by founding IAMX, he no longer felt that he was becoming X, but rather that he was X. The meaning of the {X}, according to the founder, is ever changing like a variable in a mathematical equation."

I think that is everyone. Some are creatures of change, of variance instead of creatures of habit perhaps. After all, it's not by being creatures of habit we are defined but being catalysts and representatives of change, growth and expansion.

That we are one and a hundred different people all inside us, of different texturing, different layering, different moods, different faces, different sides, other shades of someone else--not the same as we were ever. If there is any evolving happening at all, that would be evident as part of our persona.

I am that I am does not imply action. It only implies simply its isness. Static. I AM {X} implies (an) action. Whether becoming or you get to a state of that {X} variance as that's what you are. Variance, change or fluid within the static state of isness. Talk about having your cake...

I hope I'm explaining this the way I want it to be understood but I don't know if I even fully understand it the way I want it to be understood. ;}