The Painful Hilarity of a Dysfunctional Brain

When your brain decides not to work... You want to punch a wall. Or a pillow.

Or maybe you just want to smack something, like a pillow.

Or your reflection.

Or yourself.

Regardless of what you’re doing, why you’re doing it, and when, it still happens. And oh BOY does it grind your gears! It definitely used to grind mine. Now it’s just an annoyance and a comedy source for myself, my family, and my friends. Mostly because it happens so often.

My favorite kind?

When your entire thought process just stops in the middle of a sentence. And I don’t mean an inner monologue sentence. I mean an in real-time, it’s already-coming-out-of-your-mouth sentence. I’ll literally be mid-word, and then just… Silence. Total, infuriatingly hilarious silence. Because oh great, my entire thought process just poofed into outer space again.

That happens to you too, doesn’t it? I’m sure it does.

Or maybe another kind of brain poof happens instead, like when you get up to leave one room to go into another — possibly the kitchen. Then you can’t remember what you actually went there for. You know you entered that room for something… But darn it all if you can’t remember it. Not even a little.

Oh, I have another one!

This brain poof is another common occurrence, and haha, it’s hilarious! ... Days later, when you can look back on it without being in the middle of the stupidity. That patented lapse of memory, or should I say that “Three Second Memory”? Oh, you know what I mean: Doing something either mundane or important — it doesn’t matter which one — and not even two to three seconds later, you forgot you did it. A good example of this? Putting your wallet or car keys down to do some other minute task, then coming back a few moments later… And having no clue where you put them.

Or that you even brought them into the house with you in the first place.

Those are great. We spend so much time and have so much fun trying to remember things we literally just did, or trying to find something we just put down.

So Much Fun~

Sounds familiar, doesn't it? Lots of people deal with this! The difference between "normal" people, and people like me, however? This kind of nonsense happens all the time. I wish I was kidding, but I'm not. All those goofy sayings and insults like "memory of a goldfish" or "3-second memory" or "memory the size of a peanut" and similar things are perfect examples of my life. And that's just the memory side of things!

Having a severely dysfunctional, ADHD and Autism-driven mind is quite simply chaos. Add on severe anxiety and some sprinkles of depression, and you just have one thing: A hot mess personified as a person.

And oh wait, it gets better.

Memory lapses are one thing, but what about intrusive thoughts? How could those be any worse than they already are? After all, intrusive thoughts affect everyone, not just those of us with mental problems. Why would I even bring this up?

Well, to be frank with you guys, intrusive thoughts are just plain ridiculous when you've got a majorly overactive anxiety brain!

Intrusive thoughts cease to be intrusive thoughts. They turn into frequent, everyday, nonsensical thoughts that drive you insane while also driving your anxiety through the roof. The worst part by far is that plenty of them literally make no sense. They are so nonsensical and from left field that you should know they won't amount to anything. And you do! But they still get you anyway. Whether they make you irrationally paranoid and afraid of one certain thing happening, or they cause you to be on edge all day for no real reason, they ruin you.

And here's the final nail in this ridiculous coffin: They can, and will, happen every day. Multiple times a day, even!

So yes, memes about our ridiculous thoughts are funny. First-person instances of our brains ceasing to function are hilarious! It just so happens that folks like us? We live this hilarious nonsense on the daily. We have lots of ammo~