He-He-He-He-mails

A Collection of Hilarious Office Experiences. He-He-He-He-mails: A Collection of Hilarious Office Experiences

As I sit here, reflecting on yet another weekend coming to an end, I can't help but marvel at how quickly this year has passed. It feels like just yesterday we were in April, caught between the whirlwind of events that marked that month for me. Turning 25 and changing jobs, it was a time of transitions and new beginnings. It reminds me of a peculiar encounter with an astrologer years ago during a family gathering. With a mischievous grin, he examined the lines on my palm and made an unexpected prediction - a government job awaited me at 25, my second job. Imagining myself as a dedicated IAS officer, clad in a crisp cotton sari, I couldn't help but giggle at the thought. Now, as I sit here typing away on my computer, I must admit that the astrologer was partially right, foreseeing a job change at 25. Though my present avatar is far from the civil service dream, I give him credit for that prediction.

Leaving the astrologer behind, let's talk about my job transition. When I switched companies in April, I had intended to back up all the blogs I had written on my previous employer's internal blog site. However, due to concerns about intellectual property, I left without making any backups, not even of my official emails. Looking back, I realize how foolish it was to overlook this crucial step. I did forward a few emails from my archives to my personal email address, but I didn't care much about the countless personal folders I had meticulously organized on Outlook. However, one particular folder, which I named "FUNNY," held a collection of unintentionally hilarious official emails. These were the emails that turned out to be funny in the midst of crises and high-pressure situations, like during production go-lives and "Priority-1" issues.

Allow me to share a couple of samples without mentioning any names. One incident involved our client, who collaborated with multiple vendors, including my previous employer and another Indian software firm responsible for managing their database and servers. During a critical Priority-1 issue, a flurry of emails flew back and forth between our team and the other firm's DBA. The email chain grew so long that the "CC" section resembled a novel. After resolving the issue at our end, we requested a server restart from the DBA. However, he remained silent for what felt like an eternity. When you have people breathing down your neck, every minute counts. Finally, just as we were about to lose our patience, his response arrived. I quote his exact words:

"Hi,

I am in the process of getting this done. This will take some time. Could you please bare with me for some time?

Thanks.

Mr. DBA"

As someone who pays attention to grammatical errors, I couldn't help but burst into laughter upon reading his email. The combination of his request for us to "bare" with him and the unintended imagery it evoked in our nervous and exhausted minds was simply hilarious. Before we could recover from that amusement, another email arrived from a person on the CC list, simply stating, "Sure." The mental image of the DBA and the CC guy "baring" was too comical for words. This email chain continued for a while, and with each reply, the humor escalated, providing much-needed relief from the tension that had enveloped us.

In the second incident, I play the role of the unwitting joker. I had sent an email to a senior client who possessed a wealth of industry experience. We had developed a friendly rapport, and our email exchanges, although official, carried a casual tone. One evening, a user encountered an issue and promptly sent an email seeking a quick resolution. Determined to resolve the problem promptly, I stayed late until around 10 PM to fix everything. Throughout this time, a regular email chain between the senior client and me unfolded. The following morning, when I checked my mailbox, I discovered another email chain among my colleagues discussing how I owed them a treat and should set aside 10K from my salary for an enjoyable lunch. Chuckling to myself, I prepared to respond to their email when another message arrived from the client. It read, "Thanks for all the help. Everything works fine now. Can we have a call with the user at 11 AM your time?" Relieved that the issue was resolved, I switched back to my previous email to reply to my colleagues.

However, fate had a different plan for me that morning. Without realizing it, I mistakenly replied to the client's email instead of the internal chain. My response, intended for the lunch treat discussion, read, "In your dreams! Not happening... No chance!" To make matters worse, it sounded like a rude reply to the client's appreciation email. Panic set in as I desperately searched for a way to recall the message. Before I could find a solution, I received a reply from the client that read, "Oh! Is someone having a bad morning?" I cringed at my blunder. Fortunately, the client turned out to be a jolly individual who took the mishap in good spirits, responding with laughter akin to Santa Claus's hearty "Ho Ho Ho."

My "funny" folder on Outlook contained several more of these genuine moments of office goofiness that I accumulated during my three years at my previous job. Thankfully, I was often the recipient rather than the originator of these humorous emails. Out of the countless emails I received, I made sure to save these gems on my pen drive on my last day. I sometimes find myself missing my dear "Funny" folder. In its memory, I am contemplating creating a sister folder on my current Outlook, hoping to avoid any unintentionally amusing email exchanges. Perhaps there are generous souls out there who would be kind enough to contribute their own hilarious experiences and help bring the sister folder to life. After all, we all need a good laugh from time to time.