Many of us are willing to exchange pleasantries when we pass each other while walking in the countryside, or a nod and they exchange a few friendly words, in a familiar environment or social setting. We laugh a lot when we ask the question: "Hi, how are you?", followed often by merely going through the motions for a simple "I'm fine, thank you, how's it going with you?"
I'd be amazed if it was any other answer to the question that has been asked. This is, for example, a greeting, which is sometimes not even necessary to wait for a response before we go on our way.
But what happens when we say we're fine when we're not??? We have to talk about our feelings, and regularly, to remind us of the importance of sharing with others, when we feel bad, and let them help us. But how to do it?
Context is very important when we are asked how we are. The question was if there was a quick nod of recognition, or in the event of a higher level of care? So what were they doing when we first met? Both of them were somewhere else? You are in the right place for you to start to see that you are struggling, or is it better to be planning to do for the next meeting?
Sometimes silence can seem like a simple solution, even if it may result in a higher level of stress, tension, and unease. We don't even know why this is the case, we feel that we don't find the right words to explain to you what's going on, the region due to the low mood. The keeping of a journal, or talking to someone else, and sometimes it can help us deal with the feelings of confusion and depression.
"Pretend that there is anything, it is very important to us may become an important tool in survival arsenal. This will allow us to work with them on a daily basis, it offers an attractive cover to hide behind, which will allow us to get through each day. If we really thought about it to explain how we were feeling, we wouldn't have had to worry about the distribution of, and worried about how we would recover enough after that.
- Do you consider yourself to be vulnerable can be a challenge. Once released the details of dirty or unpleasant situations are personal and cannot be cancelled. Yes, someone who will take care of us, be curious, and be open to the public on how they will be in the future, it will be a change in our relationship, and if that is the case, is it ok?
Providing verbal instructions can be a good way to start a conversation when we are feeling overwhelmed and out of sorts. Comments on: "I am fine, thank you, it's not that bad, I'm alive, I'm feeling better, I'm going to get there-all of this suggests that we may not be the happiest of our lives! The answers to these questions, it may be a challenge for the other person, to ask if everything is okay you can encourage them to ask us if we want to talk about it, or maybe you think we are organizing a coffee. But for them to stay, depends on how busy they are, how they feel about it, and whether or not they are ready to help.
How good is your relationship? Want to take the risk of changing the dynamic of the relationship to disclose no matter how hard you fight for it, only to find out what is really going on when people ask me how do you feel? In fact, it can sometimes be a bit of a problem, and if there's any time that we meet in our personal circumstances, the first topic of conversation. Sometimes, it is silent about our problems, gives us a break, and we are constantly immersing ourselves in the same situation.
You can rely on the other person's right to act in relation to you? No one wants to reveal their deepest concerns and worries are only the subject of gossip for a couple of hours later. The feeling of being able to share confidentially with other people, and to have given it a certain way, it is an important component and if we don't feel good about ourselves.
After all, it is our responsibility to share that we are in need of a little bit of care in the beginning of friendship. But in order to do this, you must be in a "good place" in order to ask for something, that there was no time to talk to them, they will feel confident enough to show you that we can feel overwhelmed, and you need someone to talk to. Also, do not take it personally when they say that they are too busy to talk right now, but it called to us.