Why It’s Important to Have Friends

By Alice Bay

Hello again!

As you can see, the topic today is why it’s important to have friends.

Growing up, I was very isolated. I lived on a farm in the middle of nowhere, which to this day has no cell service. I was lucky enough to grow up only a mile and a half away from a girl that was in my class. I considered her one of my best friends and I got along well with her older brother too, who was just in the grade above us.

In my junior high years (grade 6-8) I was quite overweight and experienced a lot of bullying. Over the summer after 6th grade was when I first started losing weight. Bullying didn’t stop though. In fact, in seventh grade, despite being bulimic, that same girl that lived just down the road from me, took my phone and messaged everyone, including my youth pastor, that I was so fat because I was pregnant.

Not only that but there was two boys in my class that kept harassing me. One was a tall boy who would constantly dry hump my leg whenever he was alone with me. The other threatened to come to my house and rape me while my family watched. He also lived only a mile from us.

I changed school districts.

My experience with my previous peers lead me to stick to myself most of high school. I had one or two friends that I interacted with. It’s not that I didn’t like people, I just didn’t want to get to know them. I wasn’t up for letting anyone in and getting hurt again.

I spent most of my days in the music room. Even during classes once it had been established with my teachers that I already knew what they were teaching. So long as I got my work done and showed up for tests, no one really cared. Why would they?

I always felt safe at my friend’s homes though, a luxury I didn’t have at my own home. I made other families, lived away from home. I weasled my way into illegitimate adoptions and just tried to find a place where I could finally be myself. I just didn’t want to be scared or alone anymore.

My favourite place was always at the local university in the summer. They hosted summer theatre classes, being there made me feel alive.

I would always go to a live musical when I was there and each time I would leave it tears, amazed at the hard work and the prosperous results of it. I knew it’s where I needed to be.

And thanks to the friends I’ve made over the years, I’ve ended up here. As I’ve mentioned before, our team can’t lose 🖤

The key is honesty and open communication. Hold yourself and others at a higher standard and follow through on the changes you commit to.

Without my friends, I’d probably be living on that same farm in the middle of nowhere, alone, singing to myself, wondering where it all went wrong. Probably leading Sunday school or sitting in yet another PTA meeting, praying to get elected for treasurer.

The mere thought of it sends me into panic attacks.

My mum’s side of the family has always been very wary of friends. They think family is all you have, I say that’s nonsense.

Honestly, every person in my family has fucked each other over in some way and no one thinks their the bad guy. At least I can name a few friends that have yet to hurt me and would do anything to help me.

Friends build you up, they help you grow. Most importantly they believe in you. Keep the good ones close to your heart, trust in the people that deserve it. Love yourself enough to know that you deserve the best.

Without my friends I’d be dead probably. They literally grabbed me from Hell and said “hold on tight hunny, we got you.” And my life has only changed for the better.

But I had to hold on. I had to trust that they wouldn’t let me fall. I had to make the choice to want to live better. It’s the best choice I’ve ever made.

I hope you all make the same choice for yourself. Who you are is not what you did; who you are is the person you wake up and choose to be every day.

Always yours,

Alice