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Why Do People Cheat?

by Cristina S 4 years ago in advice

Is cheating that necessary?

So, my question for today is, 'why do people cheat?' If you have ever cheated on someone, physically or emotionally, then you may not want to read this because I will basically be tearing you a new one. Why do you cheat? You obviously did like this person, so what compelled you to one day wake up and say, 'wow, I am going to cheat on my significant other today." The logic within cheating is very confusing and very immature. I think the most humane way to find someone else is to break up with the person you are seeing and find someone; don't stay with the person because it will only make you look like a complete piece of trash and nobody will trust you once they find out. Simple. If you lose feelings for the person you are seeing, just end it. Don't carry it on because, like I said, people will get hurt and you're just leading them on. It's unnecessary pain that can easily be solved.

Now, my theory on why people cheat. I think people cheat because they love the attention, they're attention seekers. Attention from one person isn't enough, so they need more, and what is better than attention from one person of the opposite sex? Multiple people of the opposite sex! They love being able to have backups for when their significant other is unavailable or is too busy taking care of other priorities, like family. When they feel that they aren’t getting the attention they want from the person they are committed to, they run off and try to find someone else who will give it to them. For example when a boy is addicted to sex and the minute they notice their girlfriend doesn’t want to give it to them, they dump them and find sex somewhere else. They think the relationship revolves around sex, but it doesn’t.

Another theory is that they are insecure. They are insecure and love having the security of other people, they love being able to say, "people do love me and they love me because I am able to get any person I want." And they must prove it, they prove it by cheating and they love being able to brag about how many people they are leading on. Why do you think guys love to brag about how many girls they slept with in one weekend? Because they're insecure and need to fill their ego; it's the same with cheaters. Insecurity is a deeply rooted problem within relationships, that’s why people always tell you that to love someone else you must love yourself and that is the truth; if you can’t love yourself how do you expect to love someone else and stay committed to them?

My final theory on while people cheat is because they are afraid of commitment. They have gotten themselves in a relationship that they don’t want to be in, they eventually are scared to end it, and decide to cheat. They don’t want the commitment anymore and decide to just continue to fool around while being in the other relationship. But the real way that should be handled is to just end it. Even if you are afraid to, you can come to an agreement, even decide to be a Friends with Benefits, just as long as you aren’t leading someone on who wants the relationship. If you aren’t ready for the commitment then don’t get yourself in that said ‘situation.' People need to understand that eventually you need to make a commitment to someone. Whether it’s to a friend or to your workplace, life comes with a commitment and that involves maturity.

I hate hearing boys/girls blame themselves when others cheat, that is far from the truth. It is never your fault when someone decides to cheat on you, it is and always will be the cheater's fault. People seem to always cry and cry and think “what did I do?” Let me get this straight: you did nothing wrong, you were doing everything right, you stayed committed and you stayed true to your relationship, even if the other couldn’t do that. All you should be thinking now is, “I can find someone who actually loves me now,” because that person that cheated doesn’t deserve your love anymore. You can do 100% better than that.

Now, if you are someone who has been cheating on your significant other or has cheated in the past, then please take into consideration how much unnecessary pain you have caused or are causing someone, do them a favor and end it so they can start looking for someone who loves them and will never betray them like you are currently doing or have done. Grow up. It is time to stop these games and start acting your age. If you want to fool around then go ahead, but don’t commit yourself to someone who wants a serious commitment.

Finally, my advice to those who have been cheated on: You can do way better and you know this. You can get over any person who was immature and dumb enough to cheat on you. You deserve someone who won't cheat on you and cares about you, and don't ever think to take them back because they obviously didn't care enough to stay loyal. Every human being is kick ass and deserves to be taken care of properly and loved unconditionally.

Stay rad.

advice

Cristina S

Aspiring writer and Journalist | Ontario

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