What I Learned, Loving Someone Who Never Loved Me

I first met him five years ago. He was the man who, at the time, sincerely believed that he would become the true love of my life.

I met a man who was able to overcome all my emotional barriers, he was able to penetrate my soul uniquely. We managed to establish a special and different connection from what we experienced before.

He became for me the one who was able to find a way to convince me to open up completely - so much so that I was a little scared… and yet I felt that it was right, that it was necessary.

I was completely emotionally naked in front of him. There was nothing between him and my empty soul.

He was able to awaken something in my life that I did not even suspect. And when he did, it seemed to me that a tiny but very bright sun suddenly lit up inside me.

It was as if this heat had completely warmed me up. It seemed as if I had been released from the cell I had been in all this time, without even suspecting it.

All this time I have lived an incredible and enchanting love story, the love I have wanted so much all my life. But it turned out that everything was completely wrong. I experienced an incredibly appealing lie, which - it just so happened - looked very much like what I wanted. I lived in the world of my dreams and I closed my eyes to the truth.

I fell in love with a man I just didn't like. My love went far beyond the boundaries and boundaries that I simply could not cross - and even if I could, then not with me. And that was one of the most painful awareness. Knowing that he can never love me hurts me incredibly deeply.

However, even though everything went completely wrong, I cannot deny the significance of this period of my life.

This man I fell in love with was a big mistake. But it has become the most important life lesson.

He was the man who taught me how important it is to always be honest with yourself.

Looking back, I realized that the map of our relationship was completely spread out with warning flags and alarm bells, indicating that something was very wrong with these relationships, but he refused to pay attention to them.

Unfortunately, I was not true to myself in a relationship with him. I simply ignored all signs of imminent disaster. I kept lying to myself.

I directed all my strength and energy to create an illusory image of the world because I knew in depth - I should look at our relationship without pink glasses and what I see there, I will not like at all.

I remember all those moments when I wanted to be told that he loves me, he loves me. About how crazy he longed for the passion and love I was always ready to offer him. I refused to come to terms with this bitter truth for a very long time - that's why it hurt so much when I did that.

He was the man who taught me that there are many things and people in this world that do not deserve our time or attention.

It doesn't matter how much you want to cling to someone, but if that person just doesn't suit you, there's nothing you should do about it.

I was naive. And only now do I realize that sometimes you meet people who just don't deserve your time. People who don't deserve the love you can give them. And if such a person is with you, run, run without looking back.