The Pandemic and a Pear Tree

What do you do when you are stuck home because of the pandemic? Your friends are quarantined, and your adopted sister and her husband are quarantined because they all have the virus, even though they were all vaccinated for some time. What about when your county has the highest rate of new cases in the state right now? What about grief over my brother, who died because of the virus? And what about the others that have died in my life from the virus or are struggling for months now and on hospice? She only recently has been able to shower without nursing assistance! I have been angry, and probably take it out on the wrong person or persons in my life. Maybe the partner hears a little too much foul language! Maybe I am just plain not nice right now. Many people understand. Others do not! Even vaccinated people are getting the virus. It is then difficult to convince the anti vaccers to get vaccinated. Except what if everyone was vaccinated, would we still be getting covid? Another country that the partner mentions have a 100% vaccination rate and because people from other countries are going there, the pandemic is not over there either!! I’m sure it is better though!! They also mentioned that the rate of people dying from addiction has gone up 20% since this all started. I can see that here in this country and in our state also.

Your whole life changes with the pandemic. We no longer see family, or friends like we did pre-pandemic! People are not working, or they are working from home. Our local restaurant will not be open until October, I am told, even though they could be, they have no staff! I’m getting tired of cooking. I’m getting tired of my own company. I’m getting tired of thinking about me and my woes. Like how old I’m getting, what my health conditions are, how I’m not eating right, exercising, or just plain not living right.

Time to go outside. Not really as it’s too dang hot outside. That’s the other thing that is worrisome. Why is it so hot this summer? I have been around for 67 years and have never seen this weather we have here! And the drought and the water that is missing in lakes and rivers. The fires and the smoke. Did I mention I am allergic to smoke? Then, I haven’t gotten my new garden in yet. I have a stone that my oldest son gave me that I’m hoping to plant in that garden. I have some bulbs that may or may not be viable by the time I get them in the ground! I heard the man that made the stone sculpture my son gave me is missing. No one has seen him for some time now. He isn’t the only one. My niece said her children’s father is missing. And so many others. Mostly women though. These are men. I always wonder what is going on when something like this happens. Is it safe to even go anywhere? Or is it safe anywhere. This is what happens to me when I have too much time on my hands.

When I am doing well, I live a life where I live in today only, and maintain a positive attitude and most of the time that works. I have a tendency however to take on too much. The good thing about that is it doesn’t give me time to focus on what is going to happen later today, tomorrow, next week or next year. Remember, I’m 67 and I may not be here that long. Now the other thing is that I like to stay grateful and in that way I don’t have a chance to feel sorry for myself. Grateful for the partner, the children, the grandchildren, the greatgrandchildren, other family, and friends. Then I think about all of creation and I’m grateful for all of that too. So it is time to go outside and water a few plants.

I was watering my orange tree when I noticed that the large orange growing on it was no longer there hanging so healthy looking and bright. It was just there yesterday! I have many green oranges, small and firm. They shall turn into an orange just like the one that disappeared. I suppose it was the crows that helped themselves to it. Or maybe another critter. Just when I had the thought that maybe I would get a pear tree also. I can’t help it but every time I think of a pear tree, I start to sing a partridge in a pear tree. Maybe it is a good idea not to get a pear tree, especially if you have ever heard me sing. Well, the good news about this is it reminds me of Christmas and the cold weather that I prefer.

As I was speaking with my adopted sister, we hardly spoke and she needed to get off the phone as she was running out of breath. So damn scary. Now how am I going to let go of the pandemic for the rest of the day? First, there was laughter yoga. It is chocolate Thursday with Sarah today. Then, my grandson, who is turning 8 is having a birthday party today. When his mother asked what he wanted for desert, he said, “chicken”. Isn’t 8 a great age! So then, he said, “well, I suppose an ice cream cake would be good if it can have chicken on it!” Normally she would have given him what he wanted for his birthday meal, but not today. It’s burgers and brats, chips and pop. His older brother made chicken for lunch today though. Loving those grandchildren. I will be going that way today, with precautions in place, I hate to say!! And I am hoping that will save the day❤