humor

"Humor is what binds humans together and makes difficult times just a little less painful; Sometimes you can't help but laugh. "

Top 10 Valentine’s Day Gifts
To be clear, I am that exact demographic listed above. I used to live in the Bahamas, but now I live in the Basement. My parent's basement to be precise.
By Francis Litzinger5 years ago in Humans
My Own Personal Soap Opera
SO. Here we go. I was in a relationship for a year with an Army Boy and ended up breaking up with him in December 2018. However, I had my unofficial breakup within myself in October due to long distance and I wanted to give him the respect of doing it in person.
By Laura Park5 years ago in Humans
6 Ways to Lose Your Black Card
The first thing you need to do to lose your Black Card is to read everything that is not tied down. Of course this means perusing (I read that word somewhere) works by Shakespeare and Philip K. Dick. Not necessarily lighter fare such as See Spot Run or Playboy (I hear that last is an actual publication), though those are also acceptable. The reason this is a bad thing is because all the good stuff is clearly on TV and not in books. I mean, how can studying Plato measure up to season three of Real Thots of Detroit? Clearly, such TV programming is enormously beneficial only to those who are interested in those genuine garden tools over yonder. In Detroit.
By Tim Ellerbe II5 years ago in Humans
Trip Date
She must’ve really liked me. How else could I explain what my girlfriend did on our first date? We met in University on the dance floor. She, Linda, got the relationship going. It was early on in the school year, and there were lots of meet and greets for the new students. The local campus pub was putting on a dance, and there was a rumour going around that the DJ was into the “alternative scene.”
By Francis Litzinger5 years ago in Humans
The Worst (Best) Date I Never Went On
It was the summer after high school, where this story takes place. A small town just outside a city that was topping the charts for heroin abuse. I was 18-years-old and freshly out of the worst relationship of my life. After months of gas-lighting, emotional manipulation, suicide threats, all wrapped up in a bag of cheating, I was free. My mental health was soaring in comparison to how it'd been, and so when my friend's (Jana and Jacob) asked me if I wanted to go out to eat with them and catch a movie, I happily agreed. It wasn't until I was already in the car with them that they casually mentioned my ex was coming along.
By Dez Riley5 years ago in Humans
My First (and Worst) Date
I had my first real date when I was 15. It was the first time that my dad had let me go out with a boy (granted, I never actually asked him up until this point). So how did this day that was supposed to be a memory I will remember forever turn into a complete disaster? Let's just dive right in.
By Emma Rice6 years ago in Humans
The Story of a Sock
The story I am about to tell you is one of the single most embarrassing and certainly most emotionally draining tales of my life. Sadly for me, this story is not one that yet has an end, but rather, is still a very present part of my existence that still manages to bring fear to my heart and sweat to my brow. I would also like to testify that everything mentioned in this story is true; no matter how ridiculous it may seem (the names have also been changed to protect the innocent).
By Amelia Lockhart6 years ago in Humans
The Art of Dating: Paris vs. New York
When it comes to dating, Paris and New York are like two famous men: both come with reputations that precede them. On one side of the Atlantic we have have the elitist Frenchmen, self-proclaimed ardent lovers who, paradoxically, reject the entire concept of “dating” as a restricting endeavor where romance goes to die.
By Dbag Dating6 years ago in Humans
Today Did Not Go as Planned…
I am not a person who likes confrontations—not at all. As a matter of fact, I go out of my way to completely avoid them whenever possible. But sometimes you just can’t.
By Lon Casler Bixby6 years ago in Humans
You Can't Read This While Taking a Shower
I was at The Glen, Montreal’s new giant super hospital, and a short guy who looked a lot like old Moses of ancient times was strolling by my patient’s door accompanied by a tall, smooth and loud talking sixty-year-old who’d just delivered the rich and selfish line. The smooth and loud talking sixty-year old had an assuring arm around old Moses and wore a hospital robe that revealed much of his backside, as sturdy and well-formed as any I’d seen. I thought the tall, smooth and loud talking sixty-year old could easily have been an NFL quarterback in his younger days.
By alfred warkentin6 years ago in Humans
Here, Fishy Fishy...
I know the title sounds like a old regular fishing article, but it’s not. It’s more so about my journey to becoming an avid fisher. Yeah, still sounds a bit article-like, but I know no more about fishing than the next person.
By T.C. Bosarge6 years ago in Humans
An Above Average Tinder Profile
I met my fiance on Tinder. That's the honest story. The story we tell people, because of the stigma that comes with saying we met online, is that we met through mutual friends. But now that we're a year into the engagement, I have no shame in admitting this. I met my fiance on Tinder, and it was the best decision I have ever made. Because of this, I want to share with you, Reader, what my honest Tinder profile would be, even if I had never met my fiance, so here goes. I'm Evan. I'm 24. I work as a paraeducator. I'm always busy. I know that seems like code for "won't have time to ever hang out with you," but I sincerely mean that I am, 9/10 times, busy, and the 1/10 times that I am not busy, I am taking time for myself. My life usually consists of running around and doing various things, and I won't even lie to you, that makes me the happiest in the world. Knowing that when I walk out my front door some small adventure is waiting for me is thrilling. It's like the high runners get after finishing a half marathon (which I could never do because running is against every religious belief I have, and you can't tell me otherwise. So is kale, but that is a MUCH different story). For me, the best adventures are the ones where you learn about yourself in the process. You know the countless amounts of times that I find a book that I remember from that one class I had when I was 7, and the immediate nostalgia hits? It's countless. And that's the adventure of a lifetime, to be honest with you. When I am not educating young minds, I work as an actor. For the stage. I'm not Tom Cruise or anything, nor would I ever want to be (which is not a slight against Mr. Cruise; he is one of the most talented film actors on the planet). What does that mean? It does mean, in fact, that quietly (or not, ask my fiance for proof) I will break out into song randomly. If the music makes me lose control, that's a thing and I'm not ashamed to admit it. But the stereotype that I want to destroy right damn now is that, no, I don't just listen to show tunes. Yes, Lin-Manuel Miranda is my #MCM, but he's been that since In the Heights came out. And sure, anytime Ben Platt opens his stupid talented mouth on the Dear Evan Hansen soundtrack, I get misty-eyed, but it's because he's SO. DAMN. TALENTED.
By Evan Tait6 years ago in Humans