humor
"Humor is what binds humans together and makes difficult times just a little less painful; Sometimes you can't help but laugh. "
Sleeping Debate
It had been five days since Rita and Ivy had returned from their trip to Amsterdam. The holiday did not go as planned at all, but that wasn't bad thing as far as they were concerned. Rita and Ivy had been friends since their first day of high school.
By Chloe Gilholy7 years ago in Humans
Curse of the Secret Santa
The lights. The blinking lights flashing green and red, alternating in duration, yet somehow in sync, clearly the difference maker. The lights illuminate the season. The smell of pine fills the air as I pass the rows of wreath and tree vendors. With several packages in hand, I struggle through the streets of New York feeling the brisk cool air, evidenced through my foggy breath. Yup, tis the season. It’s Christmas time. Whenever I casually walk the city streets, I always experience incidental bumping by New Yorkers seemingly in a hurry - typical. Now, there are shoppers with bags upon bags of gifts no one will ever use. I too am on that same quest except for me it’s a tradition that invokes a curse. This curse is not one conjured by a witch or warlock but one that was self-imposed, unwittingly through my own selfish, childish actions. Only after the third or fourth year as an adult did I realize I was under said curse. Some may call it retribution. Some may call it a well-deserved boomerang effect. I call it quite simply: The Curse of the Secret Santa.
By Tomas Alejandro7 years ago in Humans
Samurai Badger
Mr. Badger liked his bed. Of course, he loved his wife, but his bed was what he loved the most. He had a long-lived affair with his bed. Who could blame him? He dedicated sixty years of his life towards the creative arts and child welfare. When he wore his Salvation Army uniform for the last time, he envisioned a quiet life by the countryside.
By Chloe Gilholy7 years ago in Humans
Why Didn't I Think of That Earlier?
There is little more frustrating than the inability to come up with a witty or off-the-cuff remark when insulted (either accidentally or on purpose). You freeze. Possibly stand still. If you’re anything like me the word "fuck" repeats over and over in your head in this really urgent loop. Sometimes I used walk away to only realise at a later point that I have little crescent moons embedded in my palms from having my fists so tightly balled. The funny thing is that maybe half an hour later it comes to you—the exact thing that would’ve been perfect to say. The exact thing that would’ve knocked that smug look right off their face, or if they’d inadvertently offended you, make them reconsider the fact that they obviously hadn’t thought of your feelings. You know you’re better than this, right? You’re better than them. This wasn’t you at your best and you go mad thinking about how you’d do things differently and you would be the one walking away high-fiving people and looking smugger (is that even a word?) than that sap Juliette Lewis.
By Caroline Egan7 years ago in Humans
Matrimonial Machinations
Matrimonial Machinations "If you had listened to me, we would have been here on time!" Lena snapped as she struggled to adjust the sash on her coral sundress. Edward freely exercised his right to remain silent. Thirteen years of marriage had produced four wonderful children, along with enough arguments to last a lifetime. He knew that they had a snowball's chance in hell of winning $200,000 on the latest reality show, Love and Marriage, but it was worth a shot. Edward could only hope that the other couples would make them look like the Ozzie and Harriet viewers were looking for.
By Michael Lenzy7 years ago in Humans
Please Validate Me
I am shamelessly asking for love, validation, and the attention of strangers. At this very moment, I am attempting to fill an empty void within myself by writing absolute nonsense, hoping people will read my words and approve of me as a human being. I don't even have a topic or an opinion, I am just pouring my heart out and begging the world for love.
By Michael Thielmann7 years ago in Humans
What Are Guys' Intentions?
As a single dating woman, I often wonder what is the guy's intention? Especially when we meet for the first time. There are so many thoughts that race through my mind. I wonder, does he really like me? Could it be finance or is he looking for support? Maybe it's sex? As a woman, we mentality start tearing ourselves apart, which is crazy if you ask me. You never can tell a person's intentions from the beginning. To be honest you may not see the real person until 6 months to a year later. I know, crazy.
By Charlene AC7 years ago in Humans