Stop the Office Gossip

I am far from the ‘one that everyone likes’; however, I am nowhere near the bottom of the barrel either. At least that is what I thought, until this week. I learned the hard way that office gossip hurts. It hurts bad. But what hurts even more is that I truly thought the people causing the pain were friends of mine. I know, I know; this is childish. But is it really? In fact, it is much more probable to happen than I even imagined.

It never fails that when real flesh and bone people hurt me I inevitably turn to my social media friends. You know the ones, the ones you have never truly met and probably never will. The ones that only live on a screen, in a phone, or a laptop. Those friends. Those are the real deal friends! Those are my ride or die friends! Those are the friends that will never talk about me. And hell, if they do, I will never know. So, no harm and no foul, right?!

When I started reading story after story of people being bullied at work and the rumor mill or gossip being thrown around in office buildings around the globe; it hurt. It hurt knowing I was not the only one and that others are feeling as insignificant and uncomfortable as I am. It is one thing for people to talk about me and gossip about me, but not my online family too. They do not deserve it. I mean I do not either, but I am no longer worried about me. Now it is time to get information to my online family to help them feel better.

At first I tried to convince them that maybe it was valuable information being given, and not gossip. Possibly someone was just saying how another was so valuable and what their talents were for a given position and not the alternative. Not the negative side of things. I was quickly turned down with that option. Even though it would have been a great solution and it could all be tossed up to a miscommunication.

Once that idea did not pan out I began giving solutions to the issue. When someone comes to the group or office with gossip shut it down right away. Let them know immediately that type of conversation around you will not be tolerated and it is not necessary. This does not have to be said in a nasty way or anything, just sternly shut it down. If they get offended, let them. Maybe going forward, they will think before gossiping about people.

Not many people like to be that upfront and I can respect that. So there is always the option of changing the subject too. I told some of my online friends that next time they hear someone talking about them or someone else, just change the subject to something completely different and ridiculous. Something outlandish like the weather or the traffic. This would do two things; let the gossiper know it is time to stop gossiping and it will let them know they have other things to talk about.

The big point to remember at all times is that every single person has burdens they are carrying on their backs. When a gossiper starts their little motor they are deliberately trying to hurt someone that may very well already be hurting. Their gossip may be the last nail in their proverbial coffin. People do not need to be made to feel ‘less than’ anyone else. Especially if we are all in the same office, doing the same work, day in and day out.

At the end of the day, it does not cost a single penny to be nice to someone else.

Until Next Time.

#KristinaWrites