Staying Silent

Last night was the worse possibly night I had ever felt due to what's been going on in my little family. There was a time during my high school years I was very quiet and didn't speak my mind because I thought would hurt someone feelings. Though growing up and seeing a few of my friends and even my family do it, made me think I should speak my mind. Over time I realized I needed to be open with my mom and my dad, so I did. They knew that I wasn't going to stay quiet but what I didn't know is that my angry was getting the best of me because I had so much angry against my dad leaving me. Different situation, but moving on I knew with all that angry I couldn't hold back what needed to be said. When I got older that's when I had to do some confrontation with my dad and express how I felt when I was growing up. Seeing how things are going with my little family, and seeing that my SO is just taking orders from his dad who calls him and he does things for his dad. If I call he won't do the same for me like he does for his dad. What i also find petty is that tonight is his work Christmas party and it's family oriented and his dad told him is I go that his girlfriend won't go. It seems to me that they don't like confrontation about anything, that they live in a world that is just about them. I keep thinking that this is how I am, and I know our son will be outspoken and be able to talk to us unlike the way of his staying silent. I can't say that there are a lot of people who are comfortable with doing that. Now that my SO knows that he can be outspoken with me, he does try with his family but they automatically think he has angry and that's not true. I think he has angry pent up from him growing up and he really hasn't spoken his mind to his family, he was a very quiet type. Knowing that I haven't left him because his family just makes it seems that I'm so bad for him but yet when anyone dates a hispanic man or woman we all have to speak our mind.

Knowing that I stay home, don't speak to anyone hardly besides my dad or my grandmother, I take care of our son, make dinner, take the dog out, do everyone's laundry, make dinner and lunch, feed the baby, give him a bath, make sure the bed is made, make breakfast every now and then. I know not everyone does that but he goes to work and when he gets home he showers sometimes, but then he gets on his Xbox. It doesn't bother me that he plays video games because he does help with his son every now and then, but he is a good dad and a good partner because, we both don't cheat and I'll say I don't drive so I barely go anywhere.

Going back to speaking your mind, no one should ever keep their mouth shut because feelings build up and so does angry. I can't think that there is no one in the world that they just take orders without staying how they feel. Military doesn't count because those men and women serve our country and they choose to listen to those who are in charge. Other then them, people shouldn't have to be quiet because it's a basic human feelings. I know I was kind of putting this off a little because I have been busy with my son, it gets crazy every now and then.