Second Chance

Autumn leaves covered my car creating a scenic shade of fall. I took a deep breath and inhaled the crisp air. A light breeze brushed my neck and I bundled my jacket. The weather was cooler than usual for September. It was always my favorite time of year. There is something exciting about needing a light coat and a warm coffee.

“Ms. Antione?” Dr. Paulis asked me.

I didn’t hear him over the buzzing in my ear. It was like I was zoning out and couldn’t focus on his words.

“Ms. Antione? Are you okay? Should we call someone?” He repeated.

The doctor’s office was cold and frigid. Dr. Paulis was explaining my health condition and the words didn’t seem to make sense. How could I be sick? I felt fine. Sure, I had a few symptoms here and there, but overall, I felt fine.

Cancer. It was aggressive and would only be 6 months before it took my last breath away. I always thought my life would be standard. I imagined I would fall in love, get married, and have a family. This was not the case for me. As it turns out, I found myself living with regret and sorrow. I was given a death sentence and I didn’t live my life the way I always dreamt.

When I left the doctor’s office, I sat at a green light for a long time. I might have missed it changing from red to green more than once. The irony it was time to go in more ways than one. I rubbed my light brown eyes and drove towards home. I couldn’t think of who to call or share my sad news so I drove past my house.

I couldn’t fix the outcome of my future, but I could live my last days to the fullest. Work was my life and I wasted so much time not enjoying life. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do first, so I pulled over and grabbed a pen and a napkin. I started to make a list of all the things I wanted to do.

1. Dance in a competition.

2. See the northern lights

3. Ride in a hot air balloon.

4. Swim with the dolphins.

5. Skydiving.

To some people this list might look simple and boring, but to me it was going to be challenging. I decided to call an old flame, Eddie, that I kept in touch with over the years. He was my first and only love and always made me feel better. He was a kind soul with the perfect amount of humor.

Eddie met me at my house the next day. I told him everything and he held my hand. We made a plan to spend the next few months doing my list. The first day Eddie showed up with matching red glitter vests and tap shoes. I laughed for a solid minute.

We entered a last-minute dance competition without any training. We were terrible. At one point, I stepped on his foot and then somehow, he tripped me. It was a great start to my bucket list.

A month later, he showed up with his passport. We flew to Iceland and spent a night in a hotel pod that had a view of the Northern Lights. It was the most amazing experience. The lights seemed freeing to me. They didn’t follow any rules and they illuminated the sky. We stayed up the entire night just staring at the Aurora.

We took a hot air balloon across town the next morning. It was awful. Whose idea was that? Eddie sat on the bottom of the air balloon almost the entire ride. Who knew he was afraid of heights? I loved flying through the air and watching birds travel along with us. Hopefully the next item on the list wouldn’t scare the daylights out of him.

We flew back home twenty days later. Eddie was retired and didn’t have anywhere to be at that moment. We both were going to turn 70 in 2021. We drove to the ocean later that day. The sun was bright and shining on the water. Dolphins swam out to greet us. It was marvelous and enthralling. We learned about their communication and behavioral attributes. It was exceptional.

Our last adventure would be skydiving. Eddie was hanging onto the plane. He asked over and over again if I had another idea, but there was no turning back. I stood with the door open wind raging in front of me. This was exactly how I felt inside: Wild and free. I took a deep breath and jumped out of the plane. Excitement roared through my soul. Eddie jumped after me attached to another person. He was screaming louder than anyone has ever screamed.

The bucket list was complete. I knew my life was fulfilled and I had someone to hold my hand along the way. There was something else on my bucket list that I didn’t know I needed. Fall in love. Check.