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Sad on Valentines Day?

Why do we feel alone on Valentine's Day?

By Nila DearPublished 4 years ago 3 min read

The world has a way of shoving the big red day into our faces. Cards, bears, flowers, books, and all these random creations you can find on Instagram like bracelets that have the geographical co-ordinations of the first place you met (gag!!). It floods our social media so fast and so full-on that you're almost overwhelmed. Gift ideas and advertisements and promotions all coming at you from every company and brand under the social media sun. It's a bombardment. It makes you feel like you have to rush off and buy things, things, things, more things! Have I bought the right things, do I buy them more things? The aim is to plant a seed of doubt and worry so that you purchase 'stuff' for a day that is supposed to be about love. And sure, a gift or flowers is nice don't get me wrong! But does it need to come with all the pressure?

Now to my point, what does it do to the single guys and gals out there? In all honesty, it makes me a little stressed at the start. I try to quickly scroll past any adverts and posts about it and tell myself it doesn't matter it's just a silly day to make money from, it doesn't define my life. But the adds and promos get more and more frequent, and before I know it my feeds are jam-packed with Valentines related everythings! And now for the second part of the honesty, it starts to get me down. I start to feel bummed that I don't have anyone special to share the day with, nobody to hug and cuddle with over some takeaway or at the beach or out for dinner. Nobody to buy a special little pressie for or find a cheap yet thoughtful gesture for. I love doing those things for my loved one! Cook them some nice dinner or surprise them with something naughty, the more creative and the more thoughtfulness that goes into it the better I feel. But being single this valentines day had made me down, and it has made me THINK. I'm happy for all the people on my social media feeds sharing their dates and expressing their love for their significant other, I love love. But it got me down even more. And sitting there on Valentine's day, watching crime docco's with my dog while stuffing my face with a microwave dinner I drowned in cheese I felt more down than ever about being alone. I sat there in my miserable little state and thought about it. Why should I be so down? Why does this day make us feel so low if we don't have someone to share it with. Why does this day make us BELIEVE we need someone in order to be happy?

We have been conditioned to believe to be truly happy we need a valentine, we need a boyfriend, we need a husband or wife. It's been fed to us since we can remember and now with so much exposure to advertising and media, it's sunk deep down into our subconscious only to bring up insecurities once the 14th of February rolls around.

And then my miserable little state became less miserable. Why do I need someone!? Why should I have to have someone next to me on Valentines Day just to feel like I'm worthy and like I need validation to feel like my life's complete, to satisfy all those adds and promotions preying on desperation? The answer is simple...... I don't. You don't. We don't! If you feel lonely on Valentines Day just remember, there are 364 days left in the years to find someone, love someone and be with someone. And you can spoil them every single one of those days if it makes you happy. And if you don't have a special someone on those days just remember...... You have yourself to love.

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(Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash)


About the Creator

Nila Dear

True stories of love, relationships, heartbreak, & happiness.

Shared in hopes you find entertainment, laughter, tears, mistakes, growth, recognition, reflection, education, hope, realisations, comfort, & something positive.

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    Nila  DearWritten by Nila Dear

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