Pandemic Dating

It’s now 2022. We have been going on almost two years of uncertainty. The pandemic has caused certainty in every aspect of life. For young twenty and thirty somethings- dating has ultimately been affected.

While online dating was a norm long before Covid, some of the traditional ways we once dated are almost extinct. For much of the pandemic we have been unable to go mingle in a bar. Even when bars are open, we’ve had to sit at our tables with a group. Walking up to a guy or girl in a bar isn’t available to us as readily as it once was. Parties have ceased to exist for a lot of COVID, and they are largely dictated by one’s comfort or lack there-of. This dynamic has really made it hard to date in modern society.

Some millennials haven’t dated for the entire pandemic. They have not felt comfortable with meeting strangers from the internet and risking exposure. With the common up and downs of the pandemic, this is understandable.

I was 29 when the pandemic started. I remember my last date in the world as I knew it. It was a cold Friday in January and I got dressed up to meet a stranger off a dating app in the Gold Coast in Chicago. We sat at a bar. No masks. No rules. Life was good.

While that match didn’t last, I tried to date during the pandemic, but it had some very big challenges. In the beginning of the pandemic, when we all abided by the rules and stayed at home, I turned to the apps partially out of boredom. I came across so many matches who asked me to come “chill” at their apartments. I hadn’t even seen my friends and family at this point. I wasn’t going to a stranger’s apartment. Are you kidding me? This was a common experience, of individuals taking advantage of the restrictions to have a “night at home.”

Natalie, a 28-year-old client support specialist in Chicago found similar challenges dating during the pandemic. Her relationship at the time broke up because of the pandemic. Her partner cited the two not getting together because he thought her roommates weren’t taking COVID protocols seriously. He ultimately used it as an excuse to stay home and not see her. “He used the pandemic as an excuse to get out of the relationship,” Natalie who lives in Lincoln Park said. Differences in stances on the issue remain one of the biggest challenges of this pandemic, even 23 months later from the beginning of life as we know it forever changing.

The challenges of modern dating have always been there. So many options. Social media. Believing the grass is greener on the other side. Add on politics, vaccinations, strong views on COVID, ever changing protocols, vax cards, and dwindling mental health.

Pandemic and dating burnout are very real today. Becky, a 35-year-old bank investigator shared in these sentiments. “People are experiencing app burnout. Between paywalls, guys not responding or just real weirdos it’s enough to make you want to give them up altogether.” This opinion is shared by many, who have given up altogether on dating or online dating. Some are hoping or waiting for things to get back to “normal.”

Dating is tough enough as it is. Add an ever-changing world, fed-up people, and diminished social skills. For those looking for love in today’s society, is most certainly a battlefield. Two years have now gone by in a world that looks very different than it did in January of 2020. For those of us who continue to date in these changing times, disappointment is a common theme.